#1 humor site on the 'net

Golf Prayer

Lie down in green pastures, not still waters

Golf Prayer thanks to Roy Taylor

Psalm 23: 'The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul.'

QuotaBills
All is fair in love and golf. - American Proverb

I'm a golfer, not an athlete. - Lee Westwood

You drive for show but putt for dough. - Bobby Locke

Forget your opponents; always play against par. - Sam Snead

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. - H G Wells

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

Prayer is the act of seeing reality from God's point of view. - Philip Yancey

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

It is not our long prayers but our believing God that gets the answer. - John G. Lake

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators. - Gerald R. Ford

Prayer is the difference between the best we can do and the best God can do. - Mark Batterson

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf. - H L Mencken

Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden. - Corrie ten Boom

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

One of the quickest ways to meet new people is to pick up the wrong ball on a golf course. - Unknown

If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been. - Robert Brault

Five main components of worship: the Lord's Supper, teaching, prayer, praise, and giving. - Ravi Zacharias

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

The greatest tragedy in life is the prayers that go unanswered simply because they go unasked. - Mark Batterson

As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round. - Ben Hogan

Prayer is the difference between seeing with our physical eyes and seeing with our spiritual eyes. - Mark Batterson

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

I'm 42 around the chest, 52 around the waist, 92 around the golf course, and a nuisance around the house. - Groucho Marx

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it. - Voltaire

Prayer and the Bible became a part of my everyday thoughts and beliefs. I learned to put my trust in God and to seek Him as my strength. - Rosa Parks

Our pathways often twist through stormy landscapes; but when we look back, we'll see a thousand miles of miracles and answered prayers. - David Jeremiah

Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien

What is a prayer? Prayer is sending blessing to all. Prayer is sending your compassion to all. Prayer is creating an antidote of negative thoughts. - Osho

I don't know him very well... I've played him at golf and beat him badly both times, and I think that probably had a negative impact on him. - Donald Trump


Autumn Camouflage

Go Play Outside

Be Someone

Arkansas Divorce Application

Three Finger Carrot

Braided Horse Tail

Owl Glove

Far North Cable Guys

Openish Hours

Lead Sled Dog

Pet Food Tester

Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty

Skull Tentacles

Ukrainian Cattle Car

CreepEye

Canadian Whiskey

Winter Tree

WrenchWare

Dog Sled

Winter Ready

Bread Dress