Historical Marker

All is fair in love and golf. - American Proverb

I'm a golfer, not an athlete. - Lee Westwood

You drive for show but putt for dough. - Bobby Locke

Work: The thing that interferes with golf. - Frank Dane

Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse

Ideal Wife: Any woman who has an ideal husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Can you fix my husband? He says he's broke. - Unknown

Where there's a Will there's a Fairway. - Unknown

Her husband was infidelicate with another woman. - Archie Bunker

Golf is an easy game, it's just hard to play. - Unknown

At a round table there is no dispute about place. - Italian Proverb

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown

If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. - Dean Martin

A deaf husband and a blind wife make the best couple. - French Proverb

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near. - Helen Rowland

Jello: The only food your husband has ever learned to cook - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Retire to what? I already play golf and fish for a living. - Julius Boros

My husband is a general's chauffeur somewhere in France. - Lillie Langtry

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Milton Berle

What a lover's heart knows let no man's brain dispute. - Aberjhani

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

A husband's conjungal and a wife's convivial obligation - Archie Bunker

If it weren't for golf, I'd probably be a caddie today. - George Archer

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. - Billy Graham

Farmers: Men successful only if they sell their farms to golf clubs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I got a new set of golf clubs for my husband. Best trade I ever made. - Unknown

You realize just how bad a golfer you are when you play with Freddie. - Donald Trump

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

I don't need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course? - Babe Ruth

One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

The most popular labor-saving device today is still a husband with money. - Joey Adams

When a man retires his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income. - Chi Chi Rodriguez

There is only one Christ, Jesus, one faith. All else is a dispute over trifles. - Queen Elizabeth I

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf. - H L Mencken

My husband's German. Every night I get dressed up as Poland and he invades me. - Bette Midler

Husband-hunting: A sport in which the animal that gets caught has to buy the license - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. - Mark Twain

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones

One of the quickest ways to meet new people is to pick up the wrong ball on a golf course. - Unknown

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

Wise Husband: One who buys his wife such fine china she won't trust him to wash the dishes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? - Phyllis Diller

They say that life is a lot like golf - don't believe them. Golf is a lot more complicated. - Gardner Dickinson

The biggest battle is never on the field, the fairway, the diamond or rink: it's in your mind. - Carey Neuhoff

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

My husband and I have figured out a really good system about the housework: neither one of us does it. - Dottie Archibald

My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown

Model Wife: One who, when she spades the garden, picks up the fish worms and saves them for her husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they are on the same side. - Zig Ziglar

Golf is like any other sports competition. There is not a whole lot of point to it unless someone suffers. - Kevin Wohl

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her. - Agatha Christie

My parents live in a retirement community, which is basically a minimum-security prison with a golf course. - Joel Warshaw

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

I've known and respected your husband for many years, and what's good enough for him is good enough for me. - Groucho Marx

Being a good husband is like being a stand-up comic. You need 10 years before you can even call yourself a beginner. - Jerry Seinfeld

I don't sit around thinking that I'd like to have another husband; only another man would make me think that way. - Lauren Bacall

Golf is a thinking man's game. You can have all the shots in the bag, but if you don't know what to do with them, you've got troubles. - Chi Chi Rodriguez