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How To Enforce Social Distancing

Wanting isolation from flatulent people

How To Enforce Social Distancing thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Abstain from beans. - Pythagoras

Asphalt: Rectum trouble. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Stop and smell the roses. - Phoebe Moll

Exact: What eggs do on stage - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Each day has a color, a smell. - Chitra B. Divakaruni

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Whisker: A chef who beats eggs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Thank heavens it hath no smell. - George F. Handel

We are here on Earth to fart around. - Kurt Vonnegut

The sexual act was never constipated. - Archie Bunker

Deviled Eggs: What wicked chickens lay - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

I love the smell of napalm in the morning. - Apocalypse Now

I left as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit. - Billy Connolly

I love the smell of rain and growing things. - Serina Hernandez

I actually get quite sad when I smell bacon. - Jane Velez-Mitchell

You can't hatch chickens from fried eggs. - German Proverb

Them eggs over there are startin' to foment. - Archie Bunker

I consider exercise vulgar. It makes people smell. - Alec Yuill-Thornton

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

Perfume: Any smell that is used to drown a worse one. - Elbert Hubbard

The best smell in the world is that man that you love. - Jennifer Aniston

He has diarrhoea of words and a constipation of ideas. - Unknown

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

I bet giraffes don't even know what farts smell like. - Bill Murray

Put all your eggs in one basket, and then watch that basket. - Mark Twain

Music can be made anywhere, is invisible and does not smell. - W H Auden

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt. - Margaret Atwood

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

I used to practice Tony speeches in my bathroom with my hairbrush. - Audra McDonald

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

The first condition of understanding a foreign country is to smell it. - Rudyard Kipling

My wife likes the hockey smell because it's the smell of a warrior. - David Walton

Passing Tone: Frequently heard near the baked beans at family barbecues - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins

I'll be down in the front row with a basket of last month's eggs. - WC Fields

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

If everything is good in the henhouse yous don't have to go out for eggs. - Archie Bunker

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you're twenty minutes. - Oscar Wilde

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

Hens do cackle loudest when there's nothing vital in the eggs they've laid. - Ambrose Bierce

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous. - Ani DiFranco

Until you walk a mile in another man's moccasins you can't imagine the smell. - Robert Byrne

Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9. - Muppets

After you cut off a person's nose there is no point in giving him a rose to smell. - Ravi Zacharias

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet. - William Shakespeare

Easter is the only time when it's perfectly safe to put all of your eggs in one basket. - Evan Esar

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I like spaghetti bolognese, I like baked beans on toast. I hate French food. I hate fancy food. - Simon Cowell

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

As you walk down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round. - Ben Hogan

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Smell is a long-distance sense, a way of stretching time and finding out in advance what lies ahead. - Lyall Watson

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Breakfast is my favorite meal. I cook a big one for everyone - bacon and eggs. I own a lot of eggcups. - Emily Mortimer

The concept that vaccine-induced immunity is superior in any way to natural immunity is sheer nonsense. - Dr Steven Pelech

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

I've posed nude for a photographer in the manner of Rodin's Thinker, but I looked merely constipated. - George Bernard Shaw

I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag. - Charles Barkley

Two things are important for missionaries: (1) they have a sense of humour; and (2) the have no sense of smell. - Phil Callaway

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

An idealist is one who, on noticing that roses smell better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup. - H L Mencken

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

Real angels don't have gossamer white robes and cherubic skin. They have calloused hands and smell of the days' sweat. - Richard Evans

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

It doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. - Casablanca

I love cookies baking. During the winter, they have these candles that smell like cookies, and I always buy like a hundred of them. - Jared Padalecki

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

The difference between involvement and commitment is like an eggs and ham breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed. - Unknown

A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke. - Jenny Eclair

This is what I grew up on in Alsace. It's choucroute. I'd wake up every morning with the smell of cabbage and potatoes and pork. - Jean-Georges Vongerichten

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

I love the scents of winter! For me, it's all about the feeling you get when you smell pumpkin spice, cinnamon, nutmeg, gingerbread and spruce. - Taylor Swift

Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi


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Grass Leak

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