#1 humor site on the 'net

Icicle Drinks

Improvised ice cube solution

Icicle Drinks thanks to Lenny Versace

Q: Who is the thirstiest person in the world?
A: The person who drinks Canada Dry.
QuotaBills
Drink to me. - Pablo Picasso

I drink therefore I am. - WC Fields

Head Cold: Rheum service - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The piano has been drinking, not me. - Tom Waits

I drink to make other people more interesting. - Ernest Hemingway

Hot heads and cold hearts never solved anything. - Billy Graham

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

What good is warmth without cold to give it sweetness? - John Steinbeck

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman

I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

Of all vices, drinking is the most incompatible with greatness. - Sir Walter Scott

I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know. - WC Fields

If you're already walking on thin ice, you might as well dance. - Proverb

Yachting: standing in a cold shower tearing up hundred-dollar bills. - Unknown

Break the ice in a crowded elevator by asking how much everyone weighs. - Bill Murray

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. - Dylan Thomas

A man hath no better thing under the sun than to eat, drink, and be merry. - Ecclesiastes 8:15

I never drink coffee at lunch - I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. - Ronald Reagan

People who take cold baths never have rheumatism, but they have cold baths. - American Proverb

A man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink. - WC Fields

When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the ice box. - Marilyn Monroe

People who drink to drown their sorrow should be told that sorrow knows how to swim. - Ann Landers

I wish I could trade my heart for another liver, so I could drink more and care less. - Tina Fey

A bad cold wouldn't be so annoying if it weren't for the advice of our friends. - Kin Hubbard

The past is frozen and no longer flows, and the present is all lit up with eternal rays. - C S Lewis

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

Bad Luck: To have thirteen people seated at the table when you’re paying for the drinks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My grandfather is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle. - Henny Youngman

The drink and I have been friends for so long, it would be a pity for me to leave without one last kiss. - Turlough O'Carolan

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice. - Robin Williams

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold. - Ogden Nash

I'd hate to be an alcoholic with Alzheimer's. Imagine needing a drink and forgetting where you put it. - George Carlin

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

Passover and Easter are the only Jewish and Christian holidays that move in sync, like the ice skating pairs we saw during the winter Olympics. - Marvin Olasky


SnowCut

Umbrella For Two

Sink Drinker

Pilot Lounge

Pedal Operated Washing Machine

Just Chillin' Out

Bee Prepared

Work Siesta

Cold Books

Zebra Keyboard

Sing It Out

Cold One

Cheerful Trees

Rooftop Steps

Racing a 'Hot Rod'

Nemo Found at Japanese Sushi Bar

Painting The Center Line

Kitchen Recycling

Work Not

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Car-nage

Noah's 2021 Ark

First Dodge Ram

Redneck Wedding Limo