#1 humor site on the 'net

Isolate!

Social distancing when ordering Chinese food

Isolate! thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Glass: Chinese marijuana - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Reoriented: Sent back to China - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

Music is the universal language of mankind. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

In our rushing, bulls in china shops, we break our own lives. - Ann Voskamp

There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge

An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. - Martin Buber

I look like I'm Chinese or Thai or Japanese - very different. - Mary Kom

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

Silence is the language of God; it is also the language of the heart. - Sivananda

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

Many agree that the worst thing that could ever happen is if Russia and China get closer. - Donald Trump

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Music is the language of the spirit. It opens the secret of life bringing peace, abolishing strife. - Kahlil Gibran

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

Language, identity, place, home: these are all of a piece - just different elements of belonging and not-belonging. - Jhumpa Lahiri

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

Music expresses feeling and thought, without language; it was below and before speech, and it is above and beyond all words. - Robert G Ingersoll

When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let's say, China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time. - Donald Trump

Living in China has made me appreciate my own country, with its tiny, ethnically diverse population of unassuming donut-eaters. - Jan Wong

Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn't mean anything else. - C S Lewis

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Music is a language that doesn't speak in particular words. It speaks in emotions, and if it's in the bones, it's in the bones. - Keith Richards

I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street. - W H Auden


Redneck House Move

New World Record Holder

World's Hardest Golf Shot

Safe Bike

Donut Hole History

Church Flight

Jews: The Revenge

Israel Security

Breakfast In Bed

Antler Field

Redneck Stove Burner

Texas Earrings

A Man's Life

Dog Walker

New Zealand Prepares For War

Window Washing Daredevil

Aussie Ford Coupe

Pushing The Envelope

Window Fall Repair

Bacon Balls

Tiny Forest

Inside Loo View

Finally 21

Diet Swing