#1 humor site on the 'net

Pool Is Closed

Feline dilemma: no room at the inn

Pool Is Closed thanks to Naomi Pearson

QuotaBills
The obstacle is the path. - Zen Proverb

Curiosity killed the cat. - English Proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

Catacomb: A feline grooming tool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

Don't judge a cat by its coat. - Magdalena VandenBerg

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

Cataract: Where cats hang their coats. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope. - George Burns

You will never get lessons on swimming from a drowning man. - Unknown

Dilemma: A politician trying to save both his faces at once - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard. - Steven Wright

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool. - L.M. Boyd

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

Leadership, like swimming, cannot be learned by reading about it. - Henry Mintzberg

There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat. - Wesley Bates

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor

One of my goals in life is to have the biggest residential pool on the planet. - Drake

A goal casually set and lightly taken is freely abandoned at the first obstacle. - Zig Ziglar

In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. - Warren Eckstein

Let your hook be always cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be fish. - Ovid

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. - Thomas Jefferson

I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

I guess you would say I'd be like the Michael Phelps of swimming if he wasn't there. - Ryan Lochte

I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim. - Frida Kahlo

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives. - Mark Twain

I keep fit. Every morning, I do a hundred laps of an Olympic-sized swimming pool - in a small motor launch. - Peter Cook

The best reason for a knitter to marry is that you can't teach the cat to be impressed when you finish a lace scarf. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

The symbolic want in their material possessions is only a small spec of the massive blob of need in their spiritual dilemma. - Ravi Zacharias

It's better to swim in the sea below
Than to swing in the air and feed the crow,
Says jolly Ned Teach of Bristol. - Benjamin Franklin

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


Come And Go Door Mat

Redneck Farmer

McDonalds in South America

Stealth Snake

Camouflage Pro

Beard Fashion

Playground Drivers

In Step Horse

Finger Olympics

Cow Licks

Dog Distress

Mate Attraction

Dark Room

Lineup For Dinner

Redneck Furnace

Traffic Sign Art

A Dog's Worst Nightmare

Garage Door Art

Kellogg's Fire

Teenage Independence

Parasite Trivia

Bobslide Event

Scooter Races

Bull Squirrel