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Queensland Fire Ban

Don't Even Fart Out There!

Queensland Fire Ban thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Fires and grimstones of hell - Archie Bunker

Love in its essence is spiritual fire. - Emanuel Swedenborg

I left as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit. - Billy Connolly

Content is fire and social media is gasoline. - Jay Baer

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice. - Robert Frost

Inspiration fires you up; motivation keeps you burning. - Stuart Aken

If someone's lying, are their pants really on fire? - Jerry Seinfeld

Words are only painted fire; a book is the fire itself. - Mark Twain

Love is friendship set on fire. Hate is friendship burned. - Jeremy Taylor

So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings. - JRR Tolkien

By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. - Unknown

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended. - Cher

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

The world can't end today, because it's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. - William Shakespeare

Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. - Mitchell Kapor

Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire. - Arnold H Glasow

I took a physical for some life insurance. All they would give me was fire and theft. - Milton Berle

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald, but if he has fire, women will like him. - Mae West

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. - Steven Wright

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? - George Carlin

This momentous question, like a fire bell in the night, awakened and filled me with terror. - Thomas Jefferson

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

Trials function like a fire that burns off every impurity impeding our progress towards holiness. - David Jeremiah

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? - Unknown

Just 'cause there's snow in the basement don't mean there ain't no fire in the roof! - Archie Bunker

You get the best effort from others not by lighting a fire beneath them, but by building a fire within. - Bob Nelson

In France we leave unmolested those who set fire to the house, and persecute those who sound the alarm. - Sebastien Chamfort

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

Absence destroys small passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes tapers and kindles fires. - Unknown

The fire of the diamond of true identity is always there; it just needs the Master's crafting to reveal it. - Kenneth G Mills

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly. - Stephen R. Covey

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

In case of fire, don't panic. Simply flee the building with the same reckless abandon that occurs each day at quitting time. - Don Delcourt

You don't have to say everything to be a light. Sometimes a fire built on a hill will bring interested people to your campfire. - Shannon L. Alder

A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke. - Jenny Eclair


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