#1 humor site on the 'net

Redneck Selfie Stick

High expectation for low-tech farm technology

Redneck Selfie Stick thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
Believe in your #Selfie - Unknown

Organic Farm: Tilling like it is - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Farmers are the salt of the earth. - Unknown

A selfie a day keeps the friends away. - Unknown

A selfie a day keeps insecurities away. - Unknown

A good farm is recognized as good partly by its beauty. - Wendell Berry

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? - George Carlin

I had rather be on my farm than be emperor of the world. - George Washington

Don't date a guy that takes more selfies than you do. - Unknown

She died doing what she loved, taking a selfie in traffic. - Unknown

Farm: What a city man dreams of at 5 P.M., never at 5 A.M. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

No farmer ever plowed a field by turning it over in his mind. - George E. Woodbury

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Farmers: Men successful only if they sell their farms to golf clubs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, farm boy. - Han Solo

She wears her clothes as if they were thrown on her with a pitchfork. - Jonathan Swift

The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer. - Will Rodgers

The farmer allows walkers across the field for free, but the bull charges. - Unknown

A good farmer is nothing more nor less than a handyman with a sense of humus. - E.B. White

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

You got to have smelt a lot of mule manure before you can sing like a hillbilly. - Hank Williams

Farmers don't just work til the sun goes down; they work til the job gets done. - Unknown

If you could take a selfie of your soul would you find it attractive enough to post? - Unknown

Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If a farmer fills his barn with grain, he gets mice; if he leaves it empty, he gets actors. - Bill Vaughan

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

The first farmer was the first man, and all historic nobility rests on possession and use of land. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is only the farmer who faithfully plants seeds in the Spring, who reaps a harvest in the Autumn. - B C Forbes

If the rain spoils our picnic, but saves a farmer's crop, who are we to say it shouldn't rain? - Tom Barrett

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

When tillage begins, other arts follow. The farmers, therefore, are the founders of human civilization. - Daniel Webster

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis

The only difference between a pigeon and the American farmer today is that a pigeon can still make a deposit on a John Deere. - Jim Hightower

Once in your life you need a doctor, a lawyer, a policeman, and a preacher... but every day, three times a day, you need a farmer. - Brenda Schaepp

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


Brick Shoes

Custer's Last Stand?

Hand Held Tourist

Curly Heels

Bottle Sneakret

Removed Posts

Second Hand Work

Ostrich Fill Up

Calory Bomb

Interuption Charge

Reach For Your Dreams

Perception

Jeopardy Measuring Cup

All We Have To Do Is Stand Up

Vacuum Extender

BrownEes

Chinese Puzzle Car

Always Give 100% At Work

Ancient Politician

My Toaster Is Broken

Shining Stars

Tunnel Face

The Bugs Are Bad This Year

Dog Spa