#1 humor site on the 'net

Santa Style

Looking good for the holiday season

Santa Style thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

Teeth are always in style. - Dr. Seuss

Class Action: A stylish deed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Uniform: Sheep's clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fashion should be stylish and fun. - Twiggy

Integrity never goes out of style. - Jim George

Fashions change, but style is forever. - Unknown

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

Gladly accept the gifts of the present hour. - Horace

Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind. - William Shakespeare

Fashion can be bought. Style one must possess. - Edna Woolman Chase

Do not let people form your own style for you. - Mon Levchenkova

Lingerie: The only clothing where less costs more - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

Tirade: A trip to the clothing store to steal neckwear - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Style is a natural extension of who you are as a person. - Mark Richards

Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. - Garth Brooks

Your children need your presence more than your presents. - Jesse Jackson

Finding your style is like putting puzzle pieces together. - Lara Spencer

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

The sage wears rough clothing and holds the jewel in his heart. - Lao-Tzu

Never offend people with style when you can offend them with substance. - Sam Brown

Opportunity does not knock. It presents itself when you beat down the door. - Kyle Chandler

He never chooses an opinion, he just wears whatever happens to be in style. - Leo Tolstoy

Those gifts are ever the most acceptable which the giver has made precious. - Ovid

Be stubbornly committed to your team, but flexible in your leadership style. - Jo Miller

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

Pajamas: Items of clothing that newlyweds place beside the bed in case of fire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. - Thomas Jefferson

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody. - Maya Angelou

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

The purpose of life is to discover your gifts, and the meaning of life is to give them away. - Martin Seligman

Armor: 1. A knight gown; 2. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

One of the most important gifts we have in television - the ability to heal through laughter. - Soleil M Frye

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

One of the few articles of clothing that a man won't try to remove from a woman is an apron. - Marilyn Vos Savant

Hamper: A wicker container with a lid, usually surrounded by, but not containing, dirty clothing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

Floordrobe: A floor littered with discarded clothes, viewed ironically as a clothing storage system - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

Milton's style was exactly right for what he did. He had enormous energy. Enormous vitality. He still does. - Steve Allen

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

Sailor: 1. A man who makes his living on water but never touches it on shore; 2. A wolf in ship's clothing. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Technology is a queer thing. It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the back with the other. - Carrie Snow

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

It is the style of idealism to console itself for the loss of something old with the ability to gape at something new. - Karl Kraus

Bruce Lee's fast pace, Jet Li's pretty style and Jet Li's acrobatics combine with Muay Thai for my own style. - Tony Jaa

We are all born with a grab bag on gifts and gaps. Identify your true talents, then find out how to use them to make money. - Bill O'Reilly

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

It is always self-defeating to pretend to the style of a generation younger than your own; it simply erases your own experience in history. - Renata Adler

Unrest of spirit is a mark of life; one problem after another presents itself and in the solving of them we can find our greatest pleasure. - Kal Menninger

Style used to be an interaction between the human soul and tools that were limiting. In the digital era, it will have to come from the soul alone. - Jaron Lanier

Style is that which indicates how the writer takes himself and what he is saying. It is the mind skating circles around itself as it moves forward. - Robert Frost


9 Months On The Inside

Noah Called

The Mighty Stegosaurus

Get A Dog They Said

Are You Ready?

Down Day

Peddle Sewing Machine Sink

You Never Call

Dawntastic

Work Rules

Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers

Less Severe Inflation

Hotel Annex

King Stump

Diet Carbs

Home Made Limo

Cool Reading Room

Biggest Fan On The Block

Vintage Birth Control

Close Shave

Australian RV

Panorama Dog

Revenue Canada Subscription Cancellation

Why You Shouldn't Let Your Dog Drink Beer