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Tested Positive

Viral Doctor humour for Canadian Political adherents and TP hoarders

Tested Positive thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
That virus is a pussycat. - Peter Duesberg

Has Beans: Used coffee grounds - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

Politics makes strange postmasters. - Kin Hubbard

Politics is the art of the possible. - Otto von Bismarck

Politics have no relation to morals. - Niccolo Machiavelli

In politics nothing is contemptible. - Benjamin Disraeli

I am not a politician, but a soldier. - Idi Amin

The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley

When coffee dreams, it dreams of chocolate. - Unknown

I like my men like I like my coffee. Silent. - Anna Kendrick

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? - Albert Camus

From politics, it was an easy step to silence. - Jane Austen

Practical politics consists in ignoring facts. - Henry Brooks Adams

Politics is the art of controlling your environment. - Hunter S. Thompson

I'd rather take coffee than compliments just now. - Louisa May Alcott

Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. - John Kenneth Galbraith

Document: Repeating what your Doctor told you in your own words - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker

No science is immune to the infection of politics and the corruption of power. - Jacob Bronowski

Politicians who complain about the media are like sailors who complain about the sea. - Enoch Powell

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray

If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner. - H L Mencken

It is a win-win for the American people, an idea no conventional politician would have the guts to put forward. - Donald Trump

I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I would gladly eat a network executive or a politician. - Marty Feldman

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

In politics it is necessary either to betray one's country or the electorate. I prefer to betray the electorate. - Charles de Gaulle

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

What is politics but persuading the public to vote for this and support that and endure these for the promise of those? - Gilbert Highet

Physicians and politicians resemble one another in this respect, that some defend the constitution and others destroy it. - Unknown

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan

In Mexico, an air-conditioner is called a "politician" because it makes a lot of noise but doesn't work very well. - Len Deighton

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

I am quite sure now that often in matters concerning religion and politics, a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkeys. - Mark Twain

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller


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