Tested Positive

A week is a long time in politics. - Harold Wilson

Politics is war by other measures. - Steve Bannon

There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

Politics makes strange postmasters. - Kin Hubbard

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker

When coffee dreams, it dreams of chocolate. - Unknown

I like my men like I like my coffee. Silent. - Anna Kendrick

Politics is not a game. It is an earnest business. - Winston Churchill

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller

Politicians can't manage. All they can do is talk. - Donald Trump

Depresso: The feeling you get when you run out of coffee - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems. - Paul Erdos

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

You can't get rich in politics unless you're a crook. - Harry S Truman

Irony: 1. Being witty at all costs; 2. A vegetarian catching swine flu. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Politics is a profession where the paths of glory lead but to the gravy. - Billy Boy Franklin

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney

Being a politician is a poor profession. Being a public servant is a noble one. - Herbert C Hoover

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. - Will Rogers

Politicians who complain about the media are like sailors who complain about the sea. - Enoch Powell

The single biggest threat to man's continued dominance on the planet is the virus. - Joshua Lederberg

Equine Influenza: A viral respiratory disease which causes flu-like symptoms in horses - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray

Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee, and then after that still don't talk to me. - Unknown

Get thee glass eyes;
And, like a scurvy politician, seem
To see the things thou dost not. - William Shakespeare

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

If a politician found he had cannibals among his constituents, he would promise them missionaries for dinner. - H L Mencken

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

Understand the key factors in the math behind viral marketing, and use those to figure out what it takes to get viral growth. - David Skok

Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

The politicians in Washington are spending trillions of dollars of our money. When are Americans going to stand up and say enough is enough? - Joe Wurzelbacher

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy