#1 humor site on the 'net

Wise Doctor

Interpreting a Doctor's handwriting

Wise Doctor thanks to Keith Blake

Wise Doctor thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
I told you I was sick. - B.P. Roberts

Physician, heal thyself. - Luke 4:23

Medicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous

The wisest of the wise may err. - Aeschylus

Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Patience is the companion of wisdom. - St. Augustine

Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers. - Alfred Tennyson

A man may learn wisdom even from a foe. - Aristophenes

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

A prudent question is one-half of wisdom. - Francis Bacon

Surgery is the cry of defeat in medicine. - Martin H. Fischer

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

Success: the ability to make wise decisions. - Hebrew Saying

Better a lucky physician than a learned one. - English Proverb

Knowledge can be communicated but not wisdom. - Herman Hesse

Wise is he who collects the wisdom of others. - Juan Guerra Caceras

The doctors X-rayed my head an found nothing. - Dizzy Dean

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

A wise man hears one word and understands two. - Yiddish

Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom. - Aristotle

It is never wise to discourage youthful idealism. - Stephen Kinzer

Common sense is wisdom with its sleeves rolled up. - Kyle Farnsworth

When I first found out I had diabetes I denied it. - Nell Carter

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

It is easier to be wise for others than for ourselves. - Francois De La Rochefoucauld

Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson

There can be no wise politics without thought beforehand. - Annie Besant

A fool is known by his speech; and a wise man by silence. - Pythagoras

I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards. - Henny Youngman

To live is to dream, and to dream pleasantly is to be wise. - Frederick Schiller

A wise man sees as much as he ought, not as much as he can. - Michel de Montaigne

Wisdom is oftentimes nearer when we stoop than when we soar. - William Wordsworth

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

Wise men learn by other men's mistakes, fools by their own. - H.G. Bohn

In a sick-room or a bed-room there should never be shutters shut. - Florence Nightingale

A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. - George D. Prentice

A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught. - Mark Twain

She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx

All this worldly wisdom was once the unnameable heresy of some wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

Doctors think a lot of patients are cured who have simply quit in disgust. - Don Herold

Observation, Reason, Human Understanding, Courage; these make the physician. - Martin H. Fischer

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it. - Samuel Butler

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

This is a sharp medicine, but it is a physician for all diseases and miseries. - Sir Walter Raleigh

It is wise to apply the refined oil of politeness to the mechanism of friendship. - Colette

True wisdom lies in gathering the precious things out of each hour as it goes by. - E S Bouton

The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom. - H L Mencken

The wise man should be prepared for everything that does not lie within his control. - Pythagoras

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren

The end of wisdom is to dream high enough not to lose the dream in the seeking of it. - William Faulkner

If you want to get out of medicine the fullest enjoyment, be students all your lives. - David Riesman

People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca

It requires wisdom to understand wisdom: the music is nothing if the audience is deaf. - Walter Lippmann

An almost perfect relationship with his father was the earthly root of all his wisdom. - C S Lewis

The latest thing in psychiatry is group therapy. Instead of couches, they use bunk beds. - Henny Youngman

Show me a Jewish boy who doesn't go to medical school and I'll show you a lawyer. - Milton Berle

Do not correct a fool or he will hate you. Correct a wise man and he will appreciate you. - Unknown

Wisdom is knowing what to do next, skill is knowing how to do it, and virtue is doing it. - David S Jordan

Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongue. - Old Testament

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Within us is the soul of the whole, the wise silence, the universal beauty, the eternal One. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Let your entrance into the sick room decrease, not increase, the irritability of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

Knowledge is realizing that the street is one way; wisdom is looking in both directions anyway. - Albert Einstein

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

He who devotes 16 hours a day to hard study may become as wise at 60 as he thought himself at 20. - Mary Wilson Little

Diabetes occurs at twice the rate in the African American community as it does in white Americans. - Xavier Becerra

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

The wisdom of man never yet contrived a system of taxation that would operate with perfect equality. - Andrew Jackson

I live at the dentist's. I'm on my third set of teeth that they put in with nails and screws. - Charles N. Reilly

To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine

Education: that which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding. - Ambrose Bierce

The attempt to combine wisdom and power has only rarely been successful, and then only for a short while. - Albert Einstein

He is wise who knows the sources of knowledge - who knows where it is written and where it is to be found. - A.A. Hodge

My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too. - Rodney Dangerfield

There is no such thing as an omen. Destiny does not send us heralds. She is too wise or too cruel for that. - Oscar Wilde

If you realize that you aren't as wise today as you thought you were yesterday, you're wiser today. - Unknown

My heart, which is so full to overflowing, has often been solaced and refreshed by music when sick and weary. - Martin Luther

Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet. - Rodney Dangerfield

The public needs to know - they need to know as much about atrial fibrillation as they do about cancer and diabetes. - Barry Manilow

He is one of those wise philanthropists who, in a time of famine, would vote for nothing but a supply of toothpicks. - Douglas Jerrold

To know how to grow old is the master work of wisdom, and one of the most difficult chapters in the great art of living. - Frederic Amiel

Medicine is the restoration of discordant elements; sickness is the discord of the elements infused into the living body. - Leonardo da Vinci

Each patient ought to feel somewhat the better after the physician's visit, irrespective of the nature of the illness. - Warfield Theobald Longcope

The person who has a firm trust in the Supreme Being is powerful in his power, wise by his wisdom, happy by his happiness. - Joseph Addison

We don't receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one else can take for us or spare us. - Marcel Proust

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus

It is too often seen, that the wiser men are about the things of this world, the less wise they are about the things of the next. - Edmund Gibson

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. - Anton Chekhov

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Doctors are saying that each piece of bacon you eat takes 9 minutes off of your life. Based on that math, I should have died in 1732. - Unknown

God gave unto the Animals
A wisdom past our power to see:
Each knows innately how to live,
Which we must learn laboriously. - Margaret Atwood

I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber

You've heard of people calling in sick. You may have called in sick a few times yourself. But have you ever thought about calling in well? - Tom Robbins

A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. And a psychiatrist is a man who collects the rent. - Lord Webb-Johnson

The physician should look upon the patient as a besieged city and try to rescue him with every means that art and science place at his command. - Alexander of Tralles

When you are called to a sick man, be sure you know what the matter is — if you do not know, nature can do a great deal better than you can guess. - Nicholas de Belleville


Holy Day Inn

Fat Friend Prayer

Weather Rock - For Accurate Forecasts

Moses Parting the Ice Field

Nutella Face Lotion

Men in Denim

FearBusters

I Have No Time For Your Kisses, Woman

Here We Goat Again

WatchCat

Disk Drive

Unemployed Politicians

Aye Matey

Redneck Calculator

Pocket Knots

Where Do The Amish Go For A Vacation?

Life Extension

4th Dimension Bookshelf

Water Value

Flexible Toothbrush

Redneck Dent Repair

Veterinarian or Taxidermist?

Same Sex Marriage in Canada

CardboardZilla