QuotaBillsSanta's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker
Reindeer: A horse with a hat rack - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb
A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown
Gladly accept the gifts of the present hour. - Horace
Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind. - William Shakespeare
How prone to doubt, how cautious are the wise! - Homer
Housewarming: The last call for wedding presents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Caution is not cowardice; even the ants march armed. - Uganda
I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd
Some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers. - Garth Brooks
Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons. - Ruth Ann Schabacker
Your children need your presence more than your presents. - Jesse Jackson
Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund
I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon
I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan
The policy of being too cautious is the greatest risk of all. - Jawaharlal Nehru
Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge
Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf
The wagon rests in winter, the sleigh in summer, the horse never. - Yiddish Proverb
I have learned to use the word impossible with the greatest caution. - Wernher von Braun
Middle age is when you are not inclined to exercise anything but caution. - Arthur Murray
Opportunity does not knock. It presents itself when you beat down the door. - Kyle Chandler
Those gifts are ever the most acceptable which the giver has made precious. - Ovid
Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard
Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin
If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson
Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness. - Bertrand Russell
I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller
True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker
It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody. - Maya Angelou
If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown
The purpose of life is to discover your gifts, and the meaning of life is to give them away. - Martin Seligman
One of the most important gifts we have in television - the ability to heal through laughter. - Soleil M Frye
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright
I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright
When asked what gift he wanted for his birthday, the yogi replied: I wish no gifts, only presence. - Unknown
No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby
The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes
The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan
Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey
We are each given a limitless capacity to love and attain wisdom. The extent we use these gifts is our choice. - Anthony Douglas
I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put
the batteries. - Milton Berle
Technology is a queer thing. It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the back with the other. - Carrie Snow
A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor
A life of unremitting caution, without the carefree - or even, occasionally, the careless - may turn out to be half a life. - Anna Quindlen
We are all born with a grab bag on gifts and gaps. Identify your true talents, then find out how to use them to make money. - Bill O'Reilly
Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple
If I advocate cautious optimism it is not because I do not have faith in the future but because I do not want to encourage blind faith. - Aung San Suu Kyi
Unrest of spirit is a mark of life; one problem after another presents itself and in the solving of them we can find our greatest pleasure. - Kal Menninger
Pride causes us to use our gifts as though they came from ourselves, not benefits received from God, and to usurp our benefactor's glory. - Bernard of Clairvaux