#1 humor site on the 'net

Cheap Plywood

If you can't make America great again...

Cheap Plywood thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
Shopping is my cardio. - Carrie Bradshaw

The expensive is cheap. - Arabic Saying

Window Shopping: Eye browsing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is. - Noel Coward

Tailor Shop: Last of the big-time menders - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Newly Hatched Termites: Babes in the wood - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Tweezers: A tool for removing wood splinters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson

Talk is cheap... except when Congress does it. - Unknown

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

Dialogue: Changing the colour of a piece of wood - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Download: Gettin' the firewood off the pickup - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me. - Warren Buffett

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde

A shop should be like a song of which you never tire. - Harry Gordon Selfridge

Malaria: Several shopping centers close to each other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Pre-Law: The major of a person who will end up in sales - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A chip on the shoulder is a sure sign of wood higher up. - Brigham Young

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

Oar: Clumsy wooden implement used to moisten boat occupants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself. - Harrison Ford

I can look at the knot in a piece of wood until it frightens me. - William Blake

Traditional methods of sales prospecting are grossly inefficient. - Jill Konrath

Of all ills that one endures, hope is a cheap and universal cure. - Abraham Cowley

A good thing sells itself; a bad thing advertises itself for sale. - African Saying

Xylophonist: A superstitious person who goes around knocking on wood - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I spent seven hours in a beauty shop... and that was for the estimate. - Phyllis Diller

Boat: A hole in the water surrounded by wood into which one pours money - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The mind is not a vessel that needs filling but wood that needs igniting. - Plutarch

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop. - Gertrude Stein

Athlete: A dignified bunch of muscles, unable to split wood or sift ashes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Yesterday is ashes; tomorrow wood. Only today does the fire burn brightly. - Eskimo Proverb

Real happiness is cheap enough, yet how dearly we pay for its counterfeit. - Hosea Ballou

Bargain Sale: A place where a woman can ruin one dress while she buys another - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

I shall make electricity so cheap that only the rich can afford to burn candles. - Thomas Edison

John Wooden was a hall of fame character long before he was a hall of fame coach. - John C Maxwell

I'm so ugly I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

Please don't come to my garage sale if you've ever let me borrow something. - Mike Spears

As the sculptor devotes himself to wood and stone, I would devote myself to my soul. - Toyohiko Kagawa

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

Every sale has five basic obstacles: no need, no money, no hurry, no desire, no trust. - Zig Ziglar

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

From such crooked wood as that which man is made of, nothing straight can be fashioned. - Immanuel Kant

Before enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist Saying

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

Make pumpkin bread as the default gift for everyone. It is cheap, it is beloved, it is carbs. - Karen Bender

I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? - Phyllis Diller

I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright

Indian people, we are proud of our cheapness. You are never gonna insult us by calling us cheap. - Russell Peters

To me, job titles don't matter. Everyone is in sales. It's the only way we stay in business. - Harvey Mackay

There's no point in wasting calories on cheap chocolate, always opt for the darkest and richest. - Nanci Rathbun

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

I remember when the candle shop burned won. Everyone stood around singing "Happy Birthday." - Steven Wright

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference. - Robert Frost

Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch

Indians are so dedicated to being so cheap for so long, that Indian people actually created the number zero. - Russell Peters

Too often, sales reps simply regurgitate their presentations and expect to land the sale. It doesn't work. - Harvey Mackay

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

Fiber: Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Some primal termite knocked on wood,
And tasted it, and found it good;
That is why your Cousin May
Fell through the parlor floor today. - Ogden Nash

I'm always tinkering with something - suddenly I'll think I can work with wood, but then I'll realize I can't, so I go back to sewing. - Melissa McCarthy


Child's Motorcycle Helmet

Montana Mountain Bike

Sealtastic

Bland Entrance

Cruising Advice

Cat Dugout

Open Drive Through

Secret Revealed

Tired Flagpole

Bent Car Sculpture

Cow Jacket

Thanks For Noticing

Overflow Truck Garden

Beach Sign Training

Encouraging Seal

GMC Pool

Nature Calls

You're Home Early

New Nail Gun

Long Noodles

EMS Upgrade

No Pot Of Gold

Graduation Swag

Monkeypox