#1 humor site on the 'net

Hunting Dogs For Sale

What exactly am I looking for?

Hunting Dogs For Sale thanks to Barry McCartney

Hunting Dogs For Sale thanks to Barry McCartney

QuotaBills
Colic: A sheep dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

The dog is the god of frolic. - Henry Ward Beecher

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

Dyspupsia: Being sick as a dog. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Southpaw: A dog who is left-handed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Lassitude: A heroic dog with attitude - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

How much is that doggie in the window? - Bob Merrill

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffett

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

Pants: Something a dog does and a man steps into - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wok The Dog: Specialty at Vietnamese Restaurants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

One trained dog equals 60 search-and-rescue workers. - Charles Stoehr

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

Fox hunting is the unspeakable in pursuit of the inedible. - Oscar Wilde

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

If we growl all day we're likely to feel dog tired at night. - Amish Saying

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

Diploma: 1. Da man dat fixes your pipes; 2. A job-hunting license. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

The quickest way to become an old dog is to stop learning new tricks. - John Rooney

If I could be half the person my dog is, I'd be twice the human I am. - Unknown

If you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport. - Elayne Boosler

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

Observe your dog: if he's fat, then you're not getting enough exercise. - Evan Esar

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown

Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers

Husband-hunting: A sport in which the animal that gets caught has to buy the license - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

I'm suspicious of people who don't like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person. - Unknown

America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee

Ever wonder where you'd end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? - Robert Brault

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. - Tim Vine

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. - Ernest Hemingway

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


Work At Home Mom

German Car Parkade

Dog Face or Dog Butt?

Trunk Minions

Despicable Watermelon

New Parking Spot For Women

Popcorn Cremation

Time Is Free

Fishing Trip in New Zealand

Happy 4th of July

Click Click Imaging Specialists

Awkward

Soldier Salute

You Turn

Australia 101 For Tourists

Horse Wood Sculpture

Changing Priorities Ahead

Fishing With Moses

Expired Marriage

Goose Walkers

Minion HotHead

Christopher Walken

Greek Financial Path

Miss Afghanistan Finalists