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Tire Tumor

Why the ride home was a little bumpier than normal

Tire Tumor thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Vanguard: A person who protects trucks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Power tires only those who do not have it. - Giulio Andreotti

Spare Tire: The one you check after you have a flat - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A shop should be like a song of which you never tire. - Harry Gordon Selfridge

The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining. - John F Kennedy

An optimist is a girl who mistakes a bulge for a curve. - Ring Lardner

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. - Frederick Douglass

The shortest distance between two points is usually under repair. - Unknown

A real New Yorker likes the sound of a garbage truck in the morning. - R.L. Stine

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck. - Jackie Mason

LAN: To borrow as in, 'Hey Delbert! LAN me yore truck.'” - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Pickup artist: An artist whose specialty is painting pictures of trucks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Window: 1. A looking-out glass; 2. Place in the truck to hang your guns. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You ain't going nowhere, son. You ought to go back to driving a truck. - Jim Denny

I see religion more as a truck stop on your way to figuring out who you are. - Brad Pitt

Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown

Have a heart that never hardens, a temper that never tires, a touch that never hurts. - Charles Dickens

When I got outta High School I was driving a truck. I was just a poor boy from Memphis. - Elvis Presley

I may be a living legend, but that sure don't help when I've got to change a tire. - Roy Orbison

It's easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely. - Unknown

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

Growing up, I'd just be at home, playing tennis, spending my allowance on an ice-cream truck. - Venus Williams

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Everything's challenging for me, singing-wise. I'm like an old truck with one gear left on it. - Michael McDonald

Unlucky: Crossing the street to avoid walking under a ladder and getting hit by a truck full of horseshoes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A comic should suffer as much over a single line as a man with a hernia would in picking up a heavy barbell. - WC Fields

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

Truck Driver: 1. A man who has the opportunity to run into so many nice people; 2. A guy who goes the route. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Giving up on your goal because of one setback is like slashing your other three tires because you got a flat. - Unknown

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant - and let the air out of the tires. - Dorothy Parker

The average auto owner drives so blamed reckless I'm glad that he does git robbed when he pays a repair bill. - Kin Hubbard

There's nothing to match curling up with a good book when there's a repair job to be done around the house. - Joe Ryan

Dubmerol: When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting in enjoyment of country music and pickup trucks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

She ran after the garbage truck yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!" - Red Skelton

Jawjuh: (Southern) A highly flammable state just north of Florida. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck." - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


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