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You Are What You Eat

Humour on the thin and lean side

You Are What You Eat thanks to Phil Callaway

QuotaBills
The healthy die first. - Italian Proverb

Health food makes me sick. - Calvin Trillin

Laughter is by definition healthy. - Doris Lessing

A good husband is healthy and absent. - Japanese Proverb

Happiness is good health and a bad memory. - Ingrid Bergman

Happiness is equilibrium. Shift your weight. - Tom Stoppard

It's simple. If it jiggles, it's fat. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Diets, like clothes, should be tailored to you. - Joan Rivers

My weight is perfect for my height - which varies. - Unknown

Health insurance should be a given for every citizen. - Jesse Ventura

I'm just one stomach flu away from my goal weight. - The Devil Wears Prada

I don't trust any diet that doesn't allow sugar. - Bethenny Frankel

Envy and greed starve on a healthy diet of thanksgiving. - Billy Graham

A fit, healthy body - that is the best fashion statement. - Jess C. Scott

Love is or it ain't. Thin love ain't love at all. - Toni Morrison

Nothing burns more calories than dancing in 5-inch heels. - Ariana Grande

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

If you ignore your health for long enough, it'll go away. - Unknown

Our health is a voyage and every illness is an adventure story. - Margiad Evans

Fond of lawsuits, little wealth; fond of doctors, little health. - Hebrew Proverb

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. - Markus Herz

I don't diet, I just don't eat as much as I'd like to. - Linda Evangelista

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

Your diet is a bank account. Good food choices are good investments. - Bethenny Frankel

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

When healthy competition prevails - you come out to play and you play to win. - Lorii Myers

A sure way to lose happiness is to want it at the expense of everything else. - Bette Davis

A mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. - Dorothy C Fisher

A rich rogue is like a fat hog, who never does good 'til as dead as a log. - Benjamin Franklin

I am on a ketos diet so I avoid sugar, dairy products, wheat, grain or pulses. - Puneet Issar

Observe your dog: if he's fat, then you're not getting enough exercise. - Evan Esar

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what's in it. - Nancy Pelosi

"The Hunchback Of Notre Dame" had the big fat English actor, Charles Lawson. - Archie Bunker

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

Having insurance doesn't guarantee good health outcomes, but it is a critical factor. - Irwin Redlener

Coaching doesn't make sick people well - it helps healthy people become extra-ordinary. - Thomas Leonard

On behalf of every man looking out for every girl, you are the God and weight of her world. - John Mayer

Smart people that like good health spend several hours outdoors daily in the shade of trees. - Steven Magee

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

Mental health problems do not affect three or four out of every five persons but one out of one. - William Menninger

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

I grew up on a steady diet of science fiction, especially apocalyptic and postapocalyptic fiction. - Justin Cronin

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

Nobody can fail to lose weight in the jungle, unless they've got a secret stash of pork pies somewhere. - Colin Baker

Baloney is the unvarnished lie laid on so thick you hate it. Blarney is flattery laid on so thin you love it. - Fulton J Sheen

A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. - John Updike

Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes. - Bob Thaves

Health is your greatest wealth, so experiencing a marathon and seeing what you're capable of is really special. - Christy Turlington

The first requisite of a good citizen in this republic of ours is that he shall be able and willing to pull his weight. - Theodore Roosevelt

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

Albert Schweitzer's philosophy is that a sick, miserable African of today can be a strong healthy cannibal tomorrow. - Joe E Lewis

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who make you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat. - Joanne Woodward

Fishing Journal: An imaginative work of sub-literature in which the angler records the weight, length, and species of fish he didn't catch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock

Our food pyramid, the kind of diet that is constantly promoted, is completely warped. It's not based around anything to do with healing your body. - Jessica Origliasso


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