#1 humor site on the 'net

Whole World In His Hands

I've got you covered

Whole World In His Hands thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Every artist was first an amateur. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Art is the most beautiful of lies. - Claude Debussy

Politics is the art of the possible. - Otto von Bismarck

Tea is a religion of the art of life. - Okakura Kakuzo

The human body is the best work of art. - Jess C. Scott

Art is a house that tries to be haunted. - Emily Dickinson

Our humor turns our anger into a fine art. - Mary Kay Blakely

Write injuries in sand, kindness in marble. - French Proverb

Vision is the art of seeing things invisible. - Jonathan Swift

Life is the art of drawing without an eraser. - John Gardner

Ampersand: Sand you won't find at a beach - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Art is either a plagiarist or a revolutionist. - Paul Gauguin

I teach the art of turning anguish into delight. - Georges Bataille

Good work rarely sells. I believe this of any art. - Arthur W Pinero

Making sushi is an art, and experience is everything. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Art is making something out of nothing and selling it. - Frank Zappa

The art of communication is the language of leadership. - James Humes

Botany: The art of insulting flowers in Greek and Latin. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Mathematical genius and artistic genius touch one another. - Gosta Mittag-Leffler

We need a leader that wrote "The Art of the Deal". - Donald Trump

Fine art and pizza delivery: what we do falls neatly in between. - David Letterman

Stand-up comedy is an art form and it dies unless you expand it. - Sam Kinison

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

The Iranians and Persians are excellent at the art of negotiation. - Donald Trump

We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master. - Ernest Hemingway

Art enables us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time. - Thomas Merton

A really well made buttonhole is the only link between art and nature. - Oscar Wilde

The fine art of preparing sushi is something that you watch and learn. - Nobu Matsuhisa

The role of the artist today is to defend feeling against the machine. - Marty Rubin

To say nothing, especially when speaking, is half the art of diplomacy. - Will Durant

The art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on. - Henry H Ellis

The great art of life is sensation; to feel that we exist, even in pain. - Lord Byron

All art is autobiographical. The pearl is the oyster's autobiography. - Frederico Fellini

If thou art a master, sometimes be blind; if a servant, sometimes be deaf. - Thomas Fuller

Politics is the art of choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. - John Kenneth Galbraith

The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work. - Emile Zola

An artist is somebody who produces things that people don't need to have. - Andy Warhol

The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it's dead for you. - Oscar Wilde

You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul. - George Bernard Shaw

Dancing is the only art of which we ourselves are the stuff of which it is made. - Ted Shawn

Jealousy is the art of counting someone else's blessings instead of your own. - Unknown

The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf. - Mark Twain

Every artist dips his brush in his own soul and paints his own nature into his pictures. - Henry Ward Beecher

The most potent and sacred command which can be laid upon any artist is the command: wait. - Iris Murdoch

Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better. - Andre Gide

Every portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not of the sitter. - Oscar Wilde

Writing is very much a playground - an artistic playground. It's the most fun thing I do. - Shania Twain

No artist is ahead of his time. He is his time. It is just that the others are behind the time. - Martha Graham

The more sand has escaped from the hourglass of our life, the clearer we should see through it. - Niccolo Machiavelli

The art of art, the glory of expression, and the sunshine of the light of letters, is simplicity. - Walt Whitman

Drawing is the honesty of the art. There is no possibility of cheating. It is either good or bad. - Salvador Dali

A blind man can make art if what is in his mind can be passed to another mind in some tangible form. - Sol LeWitt

I recommend that the Statue of Liberty be supplemented by a Statue of Responsibility on the west coast. - Viktor Frankl

Ethics is in origin the art of recommending to others the sacrifices required for cooperation with oneself. - Bertrand Russell

Politics is not the art of the possible. It consists in choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. - John Kenneth Galbraith

Confidence, like art, never comes from having all the answers; it comes from being open to all the questions. - Earl Gray Stevens

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums. - Steven Wright

Action is the highest perfection and drawing forth of the utmost power, vigor, and acitivty of man's nature. - Robert South

'Tis not always in a physician's power to cure the sick; at times the disease is stronger than trained art. - Ovid

A designer is an emerging synthesis of artist, inventor, mechanic, objective economist and evolutionary strategist. - R. Buckminster Fuller

To know how to grow old is the master work of wisdom, and one of the most difficult chapters in the great art of living. - Frederic Amiel

Toy Soldiers was my introduction to film. I certainly didn't think I was doing art by any stretch of the imagination. - Tim Robbins

It's tangible, it's solid, it's beautiful. It's artistic, from my standpoint, and I just love real estate. - Donald Trump

Art begins with resistance - at the point where resistance is overcome. No human masterpiece has ever been created without great labor. - Andre Gide

I love power. But it is as an artist that I love it. I love it as a musician loves his violin, to draw out its sounds and chords and harmonies. - Napoleon Bonaparte


Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring

Forever Clean Toilet

Edible Clock

Up-Set & Hungry Trucks

Bear Pinata

Swim Vacation

What Are Your Skills?

Portable Barber Shop

Snail Trail

Anger Release Machine

Pun-e Signs

Wake Me At Noon

Pringle Art

Lodge Welcome

Holstein or Holestein?

Dead Poirot

Restroom Fragrance