#1 humor site on the 'net

Fringe Personality

Trudeau's position in China's Corporate Social Credit System (CSCS)

Fringe Personality thanks to Karen Moore

QuotaBills
Glass: Chinese marijuana - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Canada was built on dead beavers. - Margaret Atwood

Focus: What Canadian politicians lack. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't even know what street Canada is on. - Al Capone

Canada has two emblems - the beaver and the maple. - John W. Dawson

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

Canada has always been there to help people who need it. - Justin Trudeau

I grew up working in Canada so everything was low budget. - Ellen Page

Canada is not the party. Its the apartment above the party. - Craig Ferguson

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

In our rushing, bulls in china shops, we break our own lives. - Ann Voskamp

Canada has never been a melting pot; more like a tossed salad. - Arnold Edinborough

If you call ham "Canadian bacon", what do you call bacon? - Michael Kelso

The Republic of China - back in the Olympic Games for the first time. - David Coleman

I've only been to these foreign countries: Canada, L.A. and Miami. - Larry the Cable Guy

For our immediate family and relatives, Canada was a land of opportunity. - Sidney Altman

Canada is the only country founded on the relentless pursuit of the rodent. - Preston Manning

I used to go missing a lot... Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World. - George Best

I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China. - Rob Lowe

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

I was in the ROTC. Of course, ROTC stood for "Running off to Canada." - Jay Leno

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

I saw a notice which said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started. - Brendan Behan

As far as single payer, it works in Canada. It works incredibly well in Scotland. - Donald Trump

I came from Canada, where it's freezing cold for seven months out of the year. - Rachelle Lefevre

Canada is the only country in the world that knows how to live without an identity. - Marshall McLuhan

I love Canada. I am from Canada. I will bash the Canadian government but never Canada. - Jason Priestley

I'm kinda disapointed that Canada isn't like the South Park movie said it was. - Joel Madden

Canada is a good country to be from. It has a gentler slower pace - it lends perspective. - Paul Anka

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Canadian hockey fans... They boo me every time I go anywhere. Because I play for Team USA. - Brett Hull

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

I am on your Walk of Fame in Toronto. My sense of humour is Canadian. But I can't vote. - Donald Sutherland

South Africa is the most beautiful country I have been to. Canada is also hugely underrated. - Honor Blackman

We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves. - Prince Philip

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

Why is America the last best hope of Earth? What if it's Liechtenstein? Or, worse, Canada? - Sarah Vowell

Like a bull into a china closet. Like in that picture, "The Prince and The Porpoise." - Archie Bunker

I think every entrepreneur in Canada owes the next generation a road map of how to do it again. - Kevin O'Leary

In Pierre Elliott Trudeau, Canada has at last produced a political leader worthy of assassination. - Irving Layton

Trudeau's contribution was not to build Canada but to destroy it, and I had to come in and save it. - Brian Mulroney

I have great, fond memories of Canada. I feel that one day my bones will more than likely end up there. - Aden Young

I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper

Make no mistake. Canada is not a bilingual country. In fact it is less bilingual today than it has ever been. - Stephen Harper

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey. - Matthew Perry

Canada has given us John Candy and Martin Short and Bill Shatner and Lord knows how many other wonderful performers. - Jamie Farr

Canada's political parties spend a few years in opposition and then govern as if it's permanent payback time. - Bob Rae

I love Canada. It makes a nice hat for America. When America runs out of water, it's the first place I'll go. - Ryan Reynolds

Canada is a balloon-puncturing country. You are not really allowed to be an icon unless you also make an idiot of yourself. - Margaret Atwood

In any world menu, Canada must be considered the vichyssoise of nations - it's cold, half-French, and difficult to stir. - Stuart Keate

When we save the rain forest, the polar bear, and Al Gore, we should party so hard that Canada calls the cops on us for noise. - Paula Poundstone

Living in China has made me appreciate my own country, with its tiny, ethnically diverse population of unassuming donut-eaters. - Jan Wong

When I was crossing the border into Canada, they asked if I had any firearms with me. I said, "Well, what do you need?" - Steven Wright

If you're skinny and you can't play hockey in Canada, you aren't left with a lot of options. I was left with running. - Malcolm Gladwell

Let me put it this way. Canada is not so much a country as a holding tank filled with the disgruntled progeny of defeated peoples. - Mordecai Richler

I have a maple leaf tattoo over my heart, quite literally, and my two favorite things on Earth are being in Canada and making movies. - Jay Baruchel

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin

Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

I deal with foreign countries. I made a lot of money dealing against China. I've made a lot of money dealing against many other countries. - Donald Trump

I'll love you, dear, I'll love you till China and Africa meet and the river jumps over the mountain and the salmon sing in the street. - W H Auden

When written in Chinese, the word "crisis" is composed of two characters. One represents danger, and the other represents opportunity. - John F Kennedy


Vatican City's New Breakfast Special

Flying Cathedral Excuse

Day At The Beach

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Amish Prom Limo

Wishy-Washy Church

'Cover Girl' Magazine

One At A Time

Shofar So Good

Temple Car

Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring