Amish Elevator View

What goes up “better” come down

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, “What is this, Father?”
The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, “Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life - I don’t know what it is.”

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheelchair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small circular numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order. Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous, voluptuous 24-year-old blonde woman stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son, “Go get your mother.”

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What a beautiful view! - Alan Shepard

Woman was God's second mistake. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

I'm a woman who wants her chocolate. - Jessica Simpson

Woman, the most dangerous of playthings. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

I was with book, as a woman is with child. - C S Lewis

Successful Woman: One who finds such a man - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A wit should be no more sincere than a woman constant. - William Congreve

A weeping man and a smiling woman are not to be trusted. - Indian Proverb

There is no elevator to success - you have to take the stairs. - Unknown

Every film is a puzzle really, from an editorial point of view. - Walter Murch

Whatever you do, do it with intelligence, and keep the end in view. - Thomas á Kempis

He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of. - Mae West

A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him. - Brendan Francis

I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a woman old enough to be my wife. - Tony Curtis

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every woman dreams of her own political career and her own place in life. - Raisa M. Gorbachev

Between man and woman there is little difference, but vive la difference. - French Proverb

The test of a man or woman's breeding is how they behave in a quarrel. - George Bernard Shaw

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

There are worse occupations in this world than feeling a woman's pulse. - Laurence Sterne

I want to be a millionaire not for the money but for the woman I will become. - Jaime Tardy

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. - WC Fields

Enthusiasm is a vital element toward the individual success of every man or woman. - Conrad Hilton

The most beautiful makeup for a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy. - Yves St. Laurent

A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform. - Diane Mariechild

I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be made at me for saying that. - Mitch Hedberg

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house. - Rod Stewart

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful, provided you get between the right man and the right woman. - Woody Allen

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

Remember, we're fighting for this woman’s honor, which is probably far more than she's ever done! - Groucho Marx

Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see life with a clearer view again. - Alex Tan

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? - Barbara Streisand

How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being. - Oscar Wilde

From a shy, timid girl I had become a woman of resolute character, who could no longer be frightened by the struggle with troubles. - Anna Dostoevsky

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

Now I lay facedown on the bed, sobbing for the woman who once slept here not knowing that someday one of her worst fears would come true. - Jennifer Castle

Strapless Gown: 1. When a woman won't shoulder the responsibility; 2. A compromise between the law of decency and the law of gravity. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com


see also   Amish & Mennonite   Section
Amish 3 Horsepower Country Camper
Amish Airlines – Maiden Voyage
Amish Centerfold
Amish Friends
Amish Man’s Occupation
Amish Mechanical Problems
Amish Prom Limo
Amish Smart Car
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22-Oct-2021