Bald Pill

Long on hair, sort on brains. - French Proverb

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffett

Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan

A hair in the head is worth two in the brush. - Oliver Herford

Don't point that beard at me – it might go off. - Groucho Marx

Can't act. Can sing. Balding. Can dance a little. - MGM Executive

I feel old when I see mousse in my opponent's hair. - Andre Aggassi

You can't compete with a six foot five man in a wig. - Shemar Moore

Every day People straighten up the hair, why not the heart? - Ernesto Guevara

There's one good thing about being bald: it's neat. - Milton Berle

Experience is a comb life gives you after you lose your hair. - Judith Stern

I have so much hair, I have a separate wig closet in my house. - Sherri Shepherd

He doesn't dye his hair, he's just prematurely orange. - Gerald Ford

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. - P G Wodehouse

I really mustache you a question... but I'll shave it for later. - Unknown

I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair. - Tom Sharp

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

I used to think I'd like less grey hair. Now I'd like more of it. - Richie Benaud

The whiter my hair becomes, the more ready people are to believe what I say. - Bertrand Russell

You can't play hockey with a bald spot, so I'm hanging up the skates. - Joe Sakic

I knew I was going bald when it was taking longer and longer to wash my face. - Harry Hill

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

I don't want a wig that looks like a wig; I want one that could pass for a weave. - Nicki Minaj

A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin

I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader

When I was with Andy Warhol, I thought, 'God, his wig looks cheaper than mine!' - Dolly Parton

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere

I love to put on a wig, a costume, inhabit a different world and be called something different. - Susan Egan

Do I have a large frog in my hair? I'm worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten. - Joaquin Phoenix

I like to put on a wig or a fake mustache and do something silly with friends, do a little dance. - Tom Lenk

It is foolish to tear one's hair in grief, as though sorrow would be made less with baldness. - Cicero

I benefit from the Mr. Potato Head syndrome. Put a wig and a nose and glasses on me, and I disappear. - Phil Hartman

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing

Kissing a man with a beard is a lot like going to a picnic. You don't mind going through a little bush to get there! - Minnie Pearl

I wore a thong and a bra and a wig. Those things hurt. I mean, thongs? Like, they dig in. It takes a tough man to be a woman. - Hank Azaria

You can not prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building a nest in your hair. - Chinese Proverb

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor