Forgetful Old Ladies

When the memory fails


Three old ladies are sitting in a diner, chatting about various things. One lady says, “You know, I’m getting really forgetful. This morning, I was standing at the top of the stairs, and I couldn’t remember whether I had just come up or was about to go down.”

The second lady says, “You think that’s bad? The other day, I was sitting on the edge of my bed, and I couldn’t remember whether I was going to bed or had just woken up!”

The third lady smiles smugly. “Well, my memory’s just as good as it’s always been, knock on wood.” She raps the table. With a startled look on her face, she asks, “Who’s there?”


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What we learn with pleasure we never forget. - Alfred Mercier

You live and learn, then die and forget it all. - Noel Coward

Can you really forgive if you can't forget? - Sarah J Parker

Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet. - Kin Hubbard

Every man's memory is his private literature. - Aldous Huxley

Life is a shipwreck but we must not forget to sing in the lifeboats. - Voltaire

I will never put off until tomorrow, what I can forget about forever. - Unknown

Elected leaders who forget how they got there won't the next time. - Malcolm Forbes

One must have a good memory to be able to keep the promises one makes. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Young men soon give, and soon forget, affronts; old age is slow in both. - Joseph Addison

He who does not remember the past is condemned to forget where he parked. - David Rudnitsky

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it. - Michel de Montaigne

Those who can't forget are worse off than those who can't remember. - Unknown

The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him. - Oscar Wilde

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. - Groucho Marx

They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel. - Carl W. Buechner

The first rule is not to lose money. The second rule is not to forget the first rule. - Warren Buffett

I have Alzheimer's bulimia - first I eat everything in sight, then I forget to puke. - Cindy Marzahn

Let us never forget that the cultivation of the earth is the most important labor of man. - Daniel Webster

Stretching his hand up to reach the stars, too often man forgets the flowers at his feet. - Jeremy Bentham

The Seven Dwarfs of Menopause: Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful and Psycho. - Unknown

Once you're a mom, you're always a mom. It's like riding a bike, you never forget. - Taraji P Henson

Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day. - Jay Leno

The way you overcome shyness is to become so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid. - Lady Bird Johnson

When I only begin to read, I forget I'm on this world. It lifts me on wings with high thoughts. - Anzia Yezierska

There's an old saying about those who forget history. I don't remember it, but it's good. - Stephen Colbert

Webnesia: The act of loading a web browser, then instantly forgetting the site you were going to visit - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

If all the young ladies who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised. - Dorothy Parker

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two... - Norman Wisdom

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

In today's rush, we all think too much, seek too much, want too much and forget about the joy of just being. - Eckhart Tolle

The more one forgets himself - by giving himself to a cause to serve or another person to love - the more human he is. - Viktor Frankl

I cannot but bless the memory of Julius Caesar, for the great esteem he expressed for fat men; and his aversion to lean ones. - David Hume

Modesty is invisibility... Never forget it. To be seen - to be seen - is to be... penetrated. What you must be girls, is impenetrable. - Margaret Atwood

Great music is that which penetrates the ear with facility and leaves the memory with difficulty. Magical music never leaves the memory. - Thomas Beecham

There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman


see also   Aging  &  Stress   Sections
Camping For Seniors
Dementia Relations
Dreams Come True
Good Morning Babushka
Grandma Not Welcome
Grandma’s Beautiful Pies
Grandma Was Here
Granny Does Windows Too

 

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31-May-2020