Pet Lobsters

Fishing without a license

After a day fishing in the ocean a fisherman is walking from the pier carrying two lobsters in a bucket. He is approached by the Game Warden who asks him for his fishing license.

The fisherman says to the warden, “I did not catch these lobsters, they are my pets. Every day I come down to the water and whistle, and these lobster jump out and I take them for a walk only to return them at the end of the day.”

The warden, not believing him, reminds him that it is illegal to fish without a license. The fisherman turns to the warden and says, “If you don’t believe me then watch,” as he throws the lobsters back into the water.

The warden says, “Now whistle to your lobsters and show me that they will come out of the water.”

The fisherman turns to the warden and says, “What lobsters?”


QuotaBills
Debate: What lures de fishes - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All men are equal before fish. - Herbert Hoover

Castanet: Primitive fishing method - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He fishes well who uses a golden hook. - Latin Proverb

Holy Mackerel: Fish served at Church supper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

Net Worth: Measurement of a fisherman's wealth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When life gives you lemons, order the lobster tail. - Ziad K. Abdelnour

One can think of life after the fish is in the canoe. - Hawaii Proverb

Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover

At high tide, fish eat ants; at low tide, ants eat fish. - Thai Saying

Don't bargain for fish which are still in the water. - India Proverb

A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats. - Benjamin Franklin

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. - George Carlin

Unabated: 1. A fishhook without a worm; 2. A mousetrap without cheese. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Europe's the mayonnaise, but America supplies the good old lobster. - D.H. Lawrence

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

Any man who puts his intelligence up against a fish and loses had it coming. - John Steinbeck

Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

Well washed and combed domestic pets grow dull; they miss the stimulus of fleas. - Francis Galton

I'm so ugly I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get. - Rodney Dangerfield

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. - Steven Wright

They laughed at Robert Fulton but without him, New York wouldn't have a fish market. - Archie Bunker

There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. - Steven Wright

Governing a large country is like frying a small fish. You spoil it with too much poking. - Lao-Tzu

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

I was in a sushi bar and it dawned on me - how could I discriminate between a cow and a fish? - Carre Otis

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

Without my pets, my wallet would be full, my house would be clean, but my heart would be empty. - Unknown

Of all the useless things a person can do, limerick writing is right up there with golf and fishing. - Garrison Keillor

Grilling outside with my parents at the Jersey shore. We would grill lobster and corn in the summer. - Bobby Flay

I was readin' an article about the animal population - there's millions of pets explodin'. - Archie Bunker

That's why I don't eat lobster or anything like that. Because they're alive when you kill it. - Nicole Polizzi

Give a man a fish and you have fed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you have fed him for a lifetime. - Chinese Proverb

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles. - Doug Larson

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins. - Dave Barry

There is only one thing harder than looking for a dewdrop in the dew, and that is fishing for a clam in the clam chowder. - New England Proverb

Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Unless he doesn't like sushi, then you also have to teach him to cook. - Auren Hoffman

It is, admittedly, a base foodstuff, but lobster, well prepared, can nevertheless be made to satisfy the distinguished gourmand. - Eli Brown

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

Fishing Journal: An imaginative work of sub-literature in which the angler records the weight, length, and species of fish he didn't catch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


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Pet Fish
Pet Fish Chores

 

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28-May-2022