The Rules of Chocolate

Are you eating too slowly?


If you’ve got melted chocolate all over your hands, you’re eating it too slowly.

Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices & strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal. It’ll take the edge off your appetite and you’ll eat less.

A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn’t that handy?

If you can’t eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can’t eat all your chocolate, what’s wrong with you?

If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

If I eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate, is that a balanced diet? Don’t they actually counteract each other?

Money talks. Chocolate sings.

Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

Q. Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
A. Because no one wants to quit.

If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated.

Put “eat chocolate” at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you’ll get one thing done.


QuotaBills
Chocolate never faileth. - Annette Lyon

Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Hot Chocolate: Stolen candy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I owe it all to little chocolate doughnuts. - John Belushi

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

Seven days without chocolate makes one weak. - Unknown

We have chocolate in common - that's enough. - Rachel Hollis

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

If it's not chocolate, it's not breakfast. - Laini Taylor

I'm not overweight, I'm chocolate enriched. - Unknown

In the cookie of life, friends are chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie

I'd give up chocolate but I'm not a quitter. - Unknown

Man can not live on chocolate alone.... but women can. - Unknown

To me, chocolate was the sole reason we on this earth. - Esi Edugyan

If chocolate is the answer, the question is irrelevant. - Kim Knott

Chocolate is nature's way of making up for Mondays. - Unknown

If there's no chocolate in Heaven, I'm not going. - Jane Seabrook

To chocolate or not to chocolate... is there any question? - Unknown

When we don't have the words, chocolate can speak volumes. - Joan Bauer

Chocolate is medicinal. I just did another study that confirms it. - Michelle M. Pillow

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

Chocolate is something you take for granted until you don't have any. - Marja McGraw

Chocolate is cheaper than therapy, and you don't need an appointment. - Unknown

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake. - Unknown

There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate. - Linda Grayson

I need God's grace and something baked with peanut butter and chocolate. - Gloria Furman

Chocolate makes otherwise normal people melt into strange states of ecstasy. - John West

A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn

Moderation, honey, in all things but love and chocolate. That's my motto. - Barbara Bretton

The 12-step chocolate program: Never be more than 12 steps away from chocolate! - Terry Moore

I want to stay curled and cosied and chocolated... forever in my mother's arms. - Sanober Khan

Chocolate comes from coco, which is a tree - that makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad. - Unknown

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

Then she thought bitterly that it would be much easier to resist chocolate if her life were less stressful. - J K Rowling

Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown

A dark-chocolate truffle melts in my mouth, and I forget about everything else... even the fact that I'm on a diet. - Barbara Brooke

It was like having a box of chocolates shut in the bedroom drawer. Until the box was empty it occupied the mind too much. - Graham Greene

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

My greatest strength is common sense. I'm really a standard brand - like Campbell's tomato soup or Baker's chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker


see also   Chocolate  Section
Chocolate Bed
Chocolate Chip Cookies for Engineers & Scientists
Chocolate Couch
Chocolate Easter Eggs
Chocolate Math
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23-Sep-2021