“No Time For Anesthetic” Golfer

Make sure the Dentist doesn’t slow down your golf game


A man and his wife walked into a Dentist’s office. The man said to the Dentist, “Doctor, I’m in a big hurry! I have two buddies sitting out in my car waiting for us to go play golf. So forget about the anesthetic and just pull the tooth and be done with it - I don’t have time to wait for the anesthetic to work!”

The Dentist thought to himself, “My goodness, this sure is a very brave man, asking me to pull his tooth without using anything to kill the pain.”

So the Dentist asked him, “Which tooth is it, sir?”

The man turned to his wife and said, “Open your mouth, Honey, and show the Doctor which tooth hurts.”


QuotaBills
Teeth are always in style. - Dr. Seuss

Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse

We break bones and we lose teeth. We play rugby. - Martin Johnson

Too much freedom can lead to the soul's decay. - Prince

Teetotaler: A golfer who only keeps track of drives - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth. - William R. Alger

Love conquers all things - except poverty and toothache. - Mae West

Conflict Of Interest: A dental school with a hockey team - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

He lied through his teeth and even his teeth were false. - Phil Callaway

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. - H G Wells

Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp

Jockey: What a dentist uses when you won't open your mouth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. - George D. Prentice

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

I'm as old as my tongue and a little bit older than my teeth. - Kris Kringle

Cavity: Empty space ready to be stuffed with dentist's bills. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. - Billy Graham

I don't need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course? - Babe Ruth

If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Too many of today's children have straight teeth and crooked morals. - Unknown

They call it golf because all of the other four-letter names were taken. - Ray Floyd

Show me a good loser and I'll show you a man playing golf with his boss. - Unknown

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. - Jack Lemmon

Drill for oil? You mean drill into the ground to try and find oil? You're crazy. - Unknown

The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Thrusting my nose firmly between his teeth, I threw him heavily to the ground on top of me. - Mark Twain

The only reason I ever played golf in the first place was so I could afford to hunt and fish. - Sam Snead

A physician buries his mistakes, a dentist pulls them out, but a teacher has to live with them. - Unknown

Some tortures are physical
And some are mental,
But the one that is both
is dental. - Ogden Nash

Stomach: 1. The home of the swallow; 2. A bowl-shaped cavity containing the organs of indigestion. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I played golf. I didn't get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying. - Mitch Hedberg

Of all the useless things a person can do, limerick writing is right up there with golf and fishing. - Garrison Keillor

I carry a golf ball to put under my feet when they get tight, and a Ther-Band for general stretching. - Jessica Ennis-Hill

If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. - Bob Hope

Most men would rather have their bellies opened for five hundred dollars than have a tooth pulled for five. - Martin H. Fischer

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

He who rejects change is the architect of decay. The only human institution which rejects progress is the cemetery. - Harold Wilson

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

Sometimes, giving up your privacy is a little like going to the dentist and we have let him have access that no one's ever had. - Tom Petty

I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene

Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden

Zipper: Two rows of unsmiling teeth that often induce laughter in others, especially when inadvertently left open following a trip to the john - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't know him very well... I've played him at golf and beat him badly both times, and I think that probably had a negative impact on him. - Donald Trump


see also   Golf  Section
Beautiful Bride - “In-dentured” For Life
Dental Checkup
Dentist Talk
Denture Cup
Dental Plan - Latest Extraction Technology
False Teeth
Hillbilly Tooth Fairy
Hippo Toothbrush
Modern Dentistry - Painful but Fast!
Nice Teeth For All The Crap He Eats
Pastor’s New Teeth
Pet Dentist
Redneck Bird Dogs
Staff Teeth
Uplifting Tooth Extraction

 

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29-Jun-2022