Did you hear about the guy who had a job circumsizing elephants?
The pay was lousy but the tips were big.
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand
Anything related to elephants is irrelephant. - Unknown
Elephino: Cross between an Elephant and a Rhinoceros - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker
I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met. - Herb Caen
If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. - Steven Wright
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne
One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx
I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne
When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln
His wallet is more capacious than an elephant's scrotum and just as difficult to get your hands on. - Blackadder
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield
A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand
Anything related to elephants is irrelephant. - Unknown
Elephino: Cross between an Elephant and a Rhinoceros - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
The patient is not likely to recover who makes the doctor his heir. - Thomas Fuller
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker
I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met. - Herb Caen
If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb
Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield
My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. - Steven Wright
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne
One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx
I wondher why ye can always read a doctor's bill an' ye niver can read his purscription. - Finley Peter Dunne
When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln
His wallet is more capacious than an elephant's scrotum and just as difficult to get your hands on. - Blackadder
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
It is astonishing with how little reading a doctor can practice medicine, but is not astonishing how badly he may do it. - William Osler
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
It is reasonable to expect the doctor to recognize that science may not have all the answers to problems of health and healing. - Norman Cousins
I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield
see also Doctor & Elephant Sections
Circumcision
Circumcision Without Paining
Whale Circumcision
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30-May-2020 |