Did you hear about the guy who had a job circumsizing elephants?
The pay was lousy but the tips were big.
No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb
One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb
God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand
My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker
A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker
If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb
First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin
No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles
One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln
If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin
I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
One doctor makes work for another. - English Proverb
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb
God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin
The way a doctor writes out a subscription. - Archie Bunker
A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington
The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand
My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker
Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. - Ronnie Shakes
Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker
A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker
If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb
First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin
No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild
People pay the doctor for his trouble; for his kindness they still remain in his debt. - Seneca
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx
A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. - Orson Welles
One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln
If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood, I'd just type a little faster. - Isaac Asimov
The doctor sees all the weakness of mankind, the lawyer all the wickedness, the theologian all the stupidity. - Arthur Schopenhauer
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis
My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick
The best doctor in the world is a veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter - he's got to know. - Will Rogers
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw
A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin
I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield
A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer
see also Doctor & Elephant Sections
Circumcision
Circumcision Without Paining
Whale Circumcision
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12-Dec-2019 |