My Ex-Wife, The Pilot

Ex-wife’s narrow escape



My ex-wife started taking flying lessons about the time our divorce started and she got her license shortly before our divorce was final, later that same year.

Yesterday afternoon I got a phone call, that she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting. Seems she was forced to make an emergency landing in Southern Tennessee because of bad weather. Thank God the kids weren’t with her.

The NTSB issued a preliminary report, citing pilot error: Judy was flying a single engine aircraft in IFR (instrument flight rating) conditions while only having obtained a VFR (visual flight rating) rating.

The absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured.

The photograph below was taken at the scene to show the extent of damage to her aircraft.
She was real lucky.

Broom looks like my wife the ex-pilot

QuotaBills
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One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife. - Groucho Marx

The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. - E. Joseph Cossman

Something in the air this morning made me feel like flying... Spring Flight - Eileen Granfors

I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me. - Brendan Behan

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her. - Red Skelton

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases. - Milton Berle

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex. She called me from Chicago last night. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

If you meet someone who can cook and do housework, don't hesitate a minute - marry him! - Rita Rudner

It was partially my fault that we got divorced. I tended to place my wife under a pedestal. - Woody Allen

Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife. - Milton Berle

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In Las Vegas, a man said to his wife, "Give me the money I told you not to give me." - Henny Youngman

During sex my wife always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel. - Rodney Dangerfield

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

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Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard for the night, she can still survive. - WC Fields

I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley

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If your cousin Maude says one wrong word to me, we're gonna be leaving before the bride takes the shower. - Archie Bunker

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. - Sam Kinison

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Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? - Barbara Streisand

A tom cat hijacked a plane, stuck a pistol into the pilot's ribs and demanded, "Take me to the Canaries." - Bob Monkhouse

Camping is not a date; it's an endurance test. If you can survive camping with someone, you should marry them on the way home. - Yvonne Prinz

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

Fraud in business is no different from infidelity in marriage or plagiarism in scholarly work. Even people committed to high moral standards succumb. - Miroslav Volf


see also   Marriage  Section
A Woman’s Mind
Arkansas Divorce Application
Babcock Divorce
Communication Divorce
Divorce Cakes
Divorce Defined
Divorce Is Grand
In Three Pictures
Just Divorced
Keyboard Wedding
Old Divorce
Perfect Divorce
Polish Divorce
Redneck Divorce
Texas Divorce
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
Understanding Women
Wedding Cake for the Submissive Husband

 

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16-Nov-2019