Hope For Siamese Twin Separation
George and Tony may soon be separated thanks to recent advances in nanosurgery
Washington, D.C (JP) - Born joined at the head, Siamese twins George and Tony may soon be separated thanks to recent advances in nanosurgery. Doctors Kettering and Brownose, buoyed by success in similar
operations on monkeys, believe that there's clearly a "good chance" that the operation will be a success - even though there's a 10% chance that one or both of the men won't survive.   Forced to do everything together ever since birth, Kettering stated that "these two men are a living nightmare - they have no quality of life, and they're having catastrophic effects on their environment." Further complications are expected, however, since George has no heart, while Tony seems to have no balls. But according to Brownose, these are not insurmountable obstacles. "If these were normal people, I think that I would be quite concerned," Brownose told joe-ks.com. "However, with politicians, this is very seldom an issue." With only one spine, it's no wonder their constituents call them 'spineless' - but we're not sure which one they're referring to.  The operation is planned for the end of 2004 if the twins decide to go ahead with the separation. If successful, one will be shorter than the other.  If the operation is not successful, they'll soon be separated by their own polls... Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli In politics nothing is contemptible. - Benjamin Disraeli The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman In politics the middle way is none at all. - John Adams The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves. - Bertrand de Jouvenel I believe that truth is the glue that holds government together. - Gerald R. Ford I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I'd be honest. - Rodney Dangerfield A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country. - Tex Guinan To say nothing, especially when speaking, is half the art of diplomacy. - Will Durant Politics is a profession where the paths of glory lead but to the gravy. - Billy Boy Franklin University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small. - Henry Kissinger Government can't give us anything without depriving us of something else. - Henry Hazlitt No science is immune to the infection of politics and the corruption of power. - Jacob Bronowski Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. - George Bernard Shaw Either the government will be given to us or we shall seize it by marching on Rome. - Benito Mussolini Political success is the ability, when the inevitable occurs, to get credit for it. - Laurence J Peter I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield Animals are like little children a bit. They're simple. They don't have politics driving them. - Annabelle Sabloff One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government. - Donald Trump Taxpayer - someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination. - Ronald Reagan I have certain rules I live by. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Nothing. Zero. - George Carlin Kissing a man with a beard is a lot like going to a picnic. You don't mind going through a little bush to get there! - Minnie Pearl It would be nice to spend billions on schools and roads, but right now that money is desperately needed for political ads. - Andy Borowitz Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book. - Ronald Reagan It was revealed in a government survey published today that the Prime Minister is doing the work of two men, Laurel and Hardy. - Ronnie Corbett Our future cannot depend on the government alone. The ultimate solutions lie in the attitudes and the actions of the American people. - Joe Biden The Bush administration said today there is a lot of support for us to attack Iraq. Exxon, Mobil, Texaco, Chevron, they're all lining up. - Jay Leno When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers Ever occur to you why some of us can be this much concerned with animals suffering? Because government is not. Why not? Animals don't vote. - Paul Harvey Political correctness is about denial, usually in the weasel circumlocutory jargon which distorts and evades and seldom stands up to honest analysis. - George M Fraser Jokes of the proper kind, properly told, can do more to enlighten questions of politics, philosophy, and literature than any number of dull arguments. - Isaac Asimov see also Family, Friend & Relationship Sections Alt-Ctrl-Del Pillows Baby Names - Denise and Denephew CatRabbit Twins Coca Cola Twins Copy & Paste Twins Fat Twin Sisters How Twins Are Made Panda Bear Summer Raise Twins Sedin Sisters Siamese Pike Twins Tumbleweed Twins Twin Dish Twin Dogs Twin Falls Twin Load Twin Towers of Hope
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