Fish Catch Of The Century

Sheamus & Bubba share their best fish yarns


Two fishermen (a Newfie and a Redneck) were swapping lies on their B.C. vacation.

Sheamus told of a tremendous struggle he had with a 250-pound salmon. Bubba listened quietly, and frankly admitted that he’d never caught anything quite that big.

Bubba then told about the time his hook snagged a lantern from the depths of a Mississippi river. The lantern carried a tag proving that it was lost 50 years ago, but the strangest thing of all was that it was a waterproof lantern – and the light was still lit.

For a long time both men sat in silence. Finally, Sheamus took a long draw on his pipe and said, “I’ll tell you what I’ll do. I’ll take 150 pounds off my fish if you’ll put out the light in your lantern.”


QuotaBills
Sushi Vendor: A sell-fish guy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Only dead fish swim with the stream. - Malcolm Muggeridge

There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb

Electric Eel: Fish that thrives in strong currents - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

One can think of life after the fish is in the canoe. - Hawaii Proverb

Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover

At high tide, fish eat ants; at low tide, ants eat fish. - Thai Saying

The fun of fishing is catching 'em, not killing 'em. - Norman Schwarzkopf

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. - Mark Twain

Habitat: Place where a particular species of fish was last week - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

Ideal Summer Resort: A place where fish bite and mosquitoes don't - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

No human being, however great or powerful, was ever so free as a fish. - John Ruskin

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson

Good fishing is just a matter of timing. You have to get there yesterday. - Milton Berle

A dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream. - WC Fields

Clement Attlee reminds me of a dead fish before it has had time to stiffen. - George Orwell

Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

Let your hook be always cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be fish. - Ovid

I went fishing with Rod Ewert. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish. - Steven Wright

There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot. - Steven Wright

Fishing is not like billiards, in which it is possible to attain a disgusting perfection. - Arthur Ransome

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

I was in a sushi bar and it dawned on me - how could I discriminate between a cow and a fish? - Carre Otis

The opposite for courage is not cowardice, it is conformity. Even a dead fish can go with the flow. - Jim Hightower

Model Wife: One who, when she spades the garden, picks up the fish worms and saves them for her husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Give a man a fish and you have fed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you have fed him for a lifetime. - Chinese Proverb

It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

Luck affects everything; let your hook always be cast. In the stream where you least expect it, there will be fish. - Ovid

Fisherman: A sportsman, who sometimes catches a big fish by patience, sometimes by luck, but most often by the tale - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens. - Bill Murray

Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. - Mark Twain

Fishing Trip: Journey undertaken by one or more anglers to a place where no one can remember when it has rained so much - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Bamboo: Eye-pleasing, but extremely expensive and difficult-to-maintain type of rod, used primarily by anglers who fish for compliments. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell


see also   Fishing  Section
“2 For 1” Fishing
Cat Fish
Catch of the Day
Catfish Bites Off More Than It Can Chew
CaughtFish
Fish Eyes
Fish Face
Fish Farm
Fishing in Florida
Frozen Fish
Leg Art
Memory Fish
Record State Catfish Catch
Redneck Bass Boat
Redneck Trophy Fish
Siamese Pike Twins
Smoked Fish Poacher

 

Down Day

Peddle Sewing Machine Sink

You Never Call

Dawntastic

Work Rules

Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers

Less Severe Inflation

Hotel Annex

King Stump

Diet Carbs

Home Made Limo

Cool Reading Room

Biggest Fan On The Block

Vintage Birth Control

Close Shave

Australian RV

Panorama Dog

Revenue Canada Subscription Cancellation

Why You Shouldn't Let Your Dog Drink Beer

Reflection
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

22-May-2022