Headline Stories

Lawyer one-upmanship - on himself

Has your sister been a pain this week?



Attorney accidentally sues himself
What goes around comes around...


We had no idea anyone was buried there!


Civil War Planes? Where did I put those history books...


Please - if you’ve seen this man...


And you wonder why...


Don’t you hate those DOE guys who do the NEPA’s EIS on
BNFL’s AMWTP at INEEL after SRA protests?


Only in America...


What are the odds of that?


The real reason for Government sub-prime
mortgage debt write-offs...


Winner of a local dog look-alike contest -
he does look exactly like his dog!


Just a friendly reminder...


Just when you thought it was around age 20...


When the Supreme Court has Noah idea what it’s talking about...


An artist’s conception of a football field after an electrical
transformer failure, knocking out the stadium lights...


“I wouldn’t do it again,” says the hero.
“She’s been a pain this week.”



QuotaBills
Order is Heaven's first law. - Alexander Pope

A good lawyer is a bad neighbor. - French Proverb

Don't judge a cat by its coat. - Magdalena VandenBerg

He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides. - Charles Lamb

Do not judge, and you will never be mistaken. - Jean-Jacques Rousseau

A government of law is a government of lawyers. - Saying

We are never to judge a philosophy by its abuse. - Augustine

Lawyers believe a man is innocent until proven broke. - Robin Hall

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Law of Inflation: Whatever goes up will go up some more. - Kin Hubbard

Ambition is like hunger; it obeys no law but its appetite. - H.W. Shaw

I've never been in love. I've always been a lawyer. - Unknown

People hasten to judge in order not to be judged themselves. - Albert Camus

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. - Hubert Humphrey

I think we may class the lawyer in the natural history of monsters. - John Keats

I would uphold the law if for no other reason but to protect myself. - Thomas More

A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy

He who will always be his own lawyer will often have a fool for a client. - J Hunter

I don't want to know what the law is, I want to know who the judge is. - Roy M. Cohn

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

It's every lawyer's dream to help shape the law, not just react to it. - Alan Dershowitz

Nobody has a more sacred obligation to obey the law than those who make the law. - Sophocles

People who use lawyers are not people you would really want to hang around with. - Deborah Ross

If a law is unjust, a man is not only right to disobey, he is obligated to do so. - Thomas Jefferson

I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. - Steven Wright

Lawyers are like rhinoceroses: thick skinned, short-sighted, and always ready to charge. - David Mellor

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

Stock Split: When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Law: an ordinance of reason for the common good, made by him who has care of the community. - Thomas Aquinas

Law enforcement cannot succeed without the sustained, and informed, interest of all citizens. - Lyndon B Johnson

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France

The law was made for one thing alone - for the exploitation of those who don't understand it. - Bertoit Brecht

The everyday kindness of the back roads more than makes up for the acts of greed in the headlines. - Charles Kuralt

There are only three ages for women in Hollywood: Babe, District Attorney, and Driving Miss Daisy. - Goldie Hawn

Put least trust in him who is foremost to praise you,
Nor judge of a road till it draw to the end. - John B O'Reilly

Beware of lawyers and consultants and people who do not take risks and who do not get their hands dirty. - Felix G Rohatyn

There is one kind of robber whom the law does not strike at, and who steals what is most precious to men: time. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods. - Albert Einstein

Why don't you put that in the headline: "He Only Did Three With Doris!" Set a lot of people straight. - Rock Hudson

The minute you read something that you can't understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. - Will Rogers

No oppression is so heavy or lasting as that which is inflicted by the perversion and exorbitance of legal authority. - Joseph Addison

That old law about "an eye for an eye" leaves everybody blind. The time is always right to do the right thing. - Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.

The courtrooms of America all too often have Piper Cub advocates trying to handle the controls of Boeing 747 litigation. - Warren E. Burger

Lawyers are like professional wrestlers. They pretend to get mad and fight, but then they socialize after a trial is over. - Robert Whitlow

I sometimes wish that people would put a little more emphasis upon the observance of the law than they do upon its enforcement. - Calvin Coolidge

It is the business of a lawyer to find a hole to creep out of any law that is in his way; and if there is no hole, to make one. - W Ouseley

Anyone who takes it on himself, on his own authority, to break a bad law, thereby authorizes everyone else to break the good ones. - Denis Diderot

Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. - Anton Chekhov

The Post Office just recalled their newest stamps. They had a picture of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on. - Marvin Lebman

There must be some honest lawyers at the New York bar, and some impartial judges on the New York bench, but I should not like to be set to find them. - Lyman Abbott


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03-Jul-2022