Good King Wenceslas rings up a local pizza restaurant to order a pizza.
“Certainly your majesty,” says the manager. “Will it be your usual? Deep pan, crisp and even?”
Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb
A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown
I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd
Fancy Restaurant: One that serves cold soup on purpose - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund
The upper crust is a bunch of crumbs held together by dough. - Joseph A. Thomas
I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan
Her face looked like something on the menu in a seafood restaurant. - Woody Allen
A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety. - Aesop
You cannot come to a Nigerian restaurant without having pepper soup. - Ben Okri
After exercising I always eat pizza... just kidding. I don't exercise. - Unknown
Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard
Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson
Zero: The number of times you’ve gotten to eat most of the pizza you ordered - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Roses are red, Pizza sauce is too, I ordered a large, and None of it is for you. - Unknown
If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six. - Yogi Berra
The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going. - George Carlin
If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown
Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino's box. - P.J. O'Rourke
They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray
I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright
No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby
The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes
The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan
Let's be frank, the Italians' technological contribution to humankind stopped with the pizza oven. - Bill Bryson
I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper
Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey
I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle
Gold and diamonds are nice, but clean, crisp, controlled water has long been the preeminent hallmark of the rich. - Anthony Doerr
I don't really drink sodas, but when I have popcorn or pizza I need a little. It's the perfect combination. - Alessandra Ambrosio
A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor
I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright
Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump
I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana
I'm always interested in finding the new trend. If you love pizza every day, after 22 years of eating pizza, you want to try sushi. - Jean Pigozzi
Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton
Cannibal: 1. One who is fed up with people; 2. A person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter; 3. One who loves his fellow man with gravy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown
I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd
Fancy Restaurant: One that serves cold soup on purpose - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund
The upper crust is a bunch of crumbs held together by dough. - Joseph A. Thomas
I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan
Her face looked like something on the menu in a seafood restaurant. - Woody Allen
A crust eaten in peace is better than a banquet partaken in anxiety. - Aesop
You cannot come to a Nigerian restaurant without having pepper soup. - Ben Okri
After exercising I always eat pizza... just kidding. I don't exercise. - Unknown
Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard
Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson
Zero: The number of times you’ve gotten to eat most of the pizza you ordered - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Roses are red, Pizza sauce is too, I ordered a large, and None of it is for you. - Unknown
If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson
You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six. - Yogi Berra
The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going. - George Carlin
If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown
Wealth is not a pizza, where if I have too many slices you have to eat the Domino's box. - P.J. O'Rourke
They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray
I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright
No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby
The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes
The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan
Let's be frank, the Italians' technological contribution to humankind stopped with the pizza oven. - Bill Bryson
I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French - surprised everybody, it was a Chinese restaurant. - Tommy Cooper
Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey
I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle
Gold and diamonds are nice, but clean, crisp, controlled water has long been the preeminent hallmark of the rich. - Anthony Doerr
I don't really drink sodas, but when I have popcorn or pizza I need a little. It's the perfect combination. - Alessandra Ambrosio
A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor
I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. - Steven Wright
Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump
I like to eat pizza and spaghetti pomodoro, and I'm crazy for dessert. I like all of them: cassata, cheesecake, biscuits. - Stefano Gabbana
I'm always interested in finding the new trend. If you love pizza every day, after 22 years of eating pizza, you want to try sushi. - Jean Pigozzi
Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton
Cannibal: 1. One who is fed up with people; 2. A person who walks into a restaurant and orders a waiter; 3. One who loves his fellow man with gravy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
see also Christmas & Pizza Sections
 Falls Trail Tree |  Melting Kayak |  Beetle Collection |  Croc Diet |  Plane Restaurant |
 Holiday Fun |  Sandwich Shoes |  Fearless |  Finally Got A Haircut |  Fedorable Platypuses |
 Lego Sushi |  Hedge Face |  Computer Bread |  Robbers Lives Matter |  UnBralievable |
 Rubble Trouble |  Pool Side |  Hair Moan Therapy |  Beachport |  Warm Nap |
06-Jul-2020 |