Redneck Gingerbread House

Oscar night at my house is called Passover. - Bob Hope

In the ant's house, the dew is a flood. - Danish Proverb

There will be no whitewash at the White House. - Richard M Nixon

A man in the house is worth two in the street. - Mae West

Hot flushes and mentalpause. House of ill refute. - Archie Bunker

It is easier to demolish a house than to build one. - Irish proverb

I have put out my books and now my house has a soul. - Cicero

He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind. - The Bible

Better a hundred enemies outside the house than one inside. - Arabic proverb

An empty purse and a new house make a man wise, but too late. - Portuguese Proverb

It's a sad house where the hen crows louder than the cock. - Scottish Proverb

May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. - George Carlin

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

When the snake is in the house, one need not discuss the matter at length. - African Saying

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak. - Tom Robbins

My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. - Steven Wright

Architect: One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money. - Ambrose Bierce

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

Now that the House of Commons is trying to become useful, it does a great deal of harm. - Oscar Wilde

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House. - Robin Williams

So finally, the great Jefferson, who always reclined to cross my freshhold is into the house. - Archie Bunker

I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

Crafting fills my life, and my closets, and my drawers, and every empty tote bag in the house. - Unknown

In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above, so I never have to go upstairs. - Steven Wright

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate.
What's going to happen to us with both a Senate and a House? - Will Rogers

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches. - Benjamin Franklin

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

Eden is that old-fashioned house
We dwell in every day
Without suspecting our abode
Until we drive away. - Emily Dickinson

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

Every woman's dream is that a man will take her in his arms, throw her into bed... and clean the whole house while she sleeps. - Unknown

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, "Who could have done this? We have no enemies." - Phyllis Diller

Science is built up with facts, as a house is with stones. But a collection of facts is no more a science than a heap of stones is a house. - Jules H Poincare

I love the scents of winter! For me, it's all about the feeling you get when you smell pumpkin spice, cinnamon, nutmeg, gingerbread and spruce. - Taylor Swift