[Hillary Clinton was sworn in today as President. She
has disposed of Bill and is spending her first night alone in the White House.
She has waited several years for this...]
FIRST NIGHT
Suddenly the ghost of George Washington appears to her...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Washington says, “Never tell a lie.”
“Ouch!” says Hillary, “I don’t know about that.”
SECOND NIGHT
The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Jefferson says, “Listen to the people.”
“Ohhh! I really don’t want to do that.”
THIRD NIGHT
On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Lincoln says, “Go to the theater.”
Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers
From politics, it was an easy step to silence. - Jane Austen
A politician... one that would circumvent God. - William Shakespeare
Government is an endless pursuit of new ways to tax. - Unknown
Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. - John Kenneth Galbraith
Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan
Poetry is about the grief. Politics is about the grievance. - Robert Frost
War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot
World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will
The institution of royalty in any form is an insult to the human race. - Mark Twain
A politician is a man who approaches every problem with an open mouth. - Adlai Stevenson
Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson
Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty
There is one higher office than president and I would call that patriot. - Gary Hart
In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney
Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation. - Henry Kissinger
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop. - P.J. O'Rourke
No science is immune to the infection of politics and the corruption of power. - Jacob Bronowski
A filmmaker we almost lost to politics... my friend and colleague, Warren Beatty. - Jack Nicholson
In America the President reigns for four years and journalism governs forever and ever. - Oscar Wilde
No president who performs his duties faithfully and conscientiously can have any leisure. - James K Polk
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks. - Doug Larson
If Hillary Clinton can't satisfy her husband what makes her think she can satisfy America. - Donald Trump
A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke
I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason. - José Maria de Eça de Queiroz
What politicians want to create is irreversible change because when you leave office someone changes it back again. - Estelle Morris
Taxpayer - someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination. - Ronald Reagan
I have certain rules I live by. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Nothing. Zero. - George Carlin
Calculating how much carbon is absorbed by which forests and farms is a tricky task, especially when politicians do it. - Donella Meadows
Everyone has a skeleton in their closet. The difference between Bill Clinton and myself is that he has a walk-in closet. - Pat Buchanan
It's especially hard if the government is not providing services, or is even conducting ethnic cleansing against you. - Paul Harvey
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. - Groucho Marx
When it comes to politics, I sit down on a sofa and grab some popcorn - or sometimes I crouch down in order not to get shot. - Sergey Galitsky
The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato
When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill
Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy
Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi
From politics, it was an easy step to silence. - Jane Austen
A politician... one that would circumvent God. - William Shakespeare
Government is an endless pursuit of new ways to tax. - Unknown
Nothing is so admirable in politics as a short memory. - John Kenneth Galbraith
Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan
Poetry is about the grief. Politics is about the grievance. - Robert Frost
War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot
World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will
The institution of royalty in any form is an insult to the human race. - Mark Twain
A politician is a man who approaches every problem with an open mouth. - Adlai Stevenson
Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson
Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty
There is one higher office than president and I would call that patriot. - Gary Hart
In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney
Ninety percent of the politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation. - Henry Kissinger
The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop. - P.J. O'Rourke
No science is immune to the infection of politics and the corruption of power. - Jacob Bronowski
A filmmaker we almost lost to politics... my friend and colleague, Warren Beatty. - Jack Nicholson
In America the President reigns for four years and journalism governs forever and ever. - Oscar Wilde
No president who performs his duties faithfully and conscientiously can have any leisure. - James K Polk
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks. - Doug Larson
If Hillary Clinton can't satisfy her husband what makes her think she can satisfy America. - Donald Trump
A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke
I must study politics and war that my sons may have the liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. - John Adams
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason. - José Maria de Eça de Queiroz
What politicians want to create is irreversible change because when you leave office someone changes it back again. - Estelle Morris
Taxpayer - someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination. - Ronald Reagan
I have certain rules I live by. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Nothing. Zero. - George Carlin
Calculating how much carbon is absorbed by which forests and farms is a tricky task, especially when politicians do it. - Donella Meadows
Everyone has a skeleton in their closet. The difference between Bill Clinton and myself is that he has a walk-in closet. - Pat Buchanan
It's especially hard if the government is not providing services, or is even conducting ethnic cleansing against you. - Paul Harvey
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. - Groucho Marx
When it comes to politics, I sit down on a sofa and grab some popcorn - or sometimes I crouch down in order not to get shot. - Sergey Galitsky
The punishment which the wise suffer who refuse to take part in the government, is to live under the government of worse men. - Plato
When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill
Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy
Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi
see also Government, History & Politics Sections
Hillary in 2007: Democrat Gift
Bill & Hillary in 2009: Clinton Combo Kitchen Tool Set
America’s Moment of Truth
Bucket of Hillary
Da Queen
Donald Trump White House
First Dog
Happy Scary Halloween
Hillarius Trump
Hillary Hairstyle
Redneck Politician
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