Hillary’s First Night As President

White House inspiration for the First Lady


[Hillary Clinton was sworn in today as President. She has disposed of Bill and is spending her first night alone in the White House. She has waited several years for this...]

FIRST NIGHT
Suddenly the ghost of George Washington appears to her...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Washington says, “Never tell a lie.”
“Ouch!” says Hillary, “I don’t know about that.”

SECOND NIGHT
The next night, the ghost of Thomas Jefferson appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Jefferson says, “Listen to the people.”
“Ohhh! I really don’t want to do that.”

THIRD NIGHT
On the third night, the ghost of Abe Lincoln appears...
Hillary says, “How can I best serve my country?”
Lincoln says, “Go to the theater.”


QuotaBills
There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

Politics is the art of the possible. - Otto von Bismarck

Politics have no relation to morals. - Niccolo Machiavelli

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

Politics is just show business for ugly people. - Jay Leno

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller

If men were angels, no government would be necessary. - James Madison

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia. - Otto von Bismarck

What this country needs are more unemployed politicians. - Edward Langley

Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan

The military don't start wars. Politicians start wars. - William Westmoreland

Politics is for the present, but an equation is for eternity. - Albert Einstein

The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep. - George Stephanopolous

World War II was the last government program that really worked. - George Will

Needless to say, the president is correct. Whatever it was he said. - Donald Rumsfeld

A politician is a man who approaches every problem with an open mouth. - Adlai Stevenson

There is one higher office than president and I would call that patriot. - Gary Hart

In politics, madame, you need two things: friends, but above all an enemy. - Brian Mulroney

If politicians and scientists were lazier, how much happier we should all be. - Evelyn Waugh

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

American Politics: A form of socialism for the rich, including the politicians. - Gregory Nunn

Hillary Clinton is not going to be able to create jobs, I will tell you right now. - Donald Trump

The fastest way for a politician to become an elder statesman is to lose an election. - Earl Wilson

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. - Will Rogers

Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build bridges even when there are no rivers. - Nikita Khruschev

President Ford tells us all to bite the bullet and Betsy Ford goes on TV and shoots off her mouth. - Archie Bunker

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. Now I'm beginning to believe it. - Clarence Darrow

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

Politics, for years, or all too long, has been concerned with right or left instead of right or wrong. - Richard Armour

One of the key problems today is that politics is such a disgrace, good people don't go into government. - Donald Trump

Democracy means that anyone can grow up to be president, and anyone who doesn't grow up can be vice president. - Johnny Carson

When the President decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no matter what happened Tuesday. - Stephen Colbert

What is politics but persuading the public to vote for this and support that and endure these for the promise of those? - Gilbert Highet

It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen. - George MacDonald

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

Judge: 1. A law student who marks his own examination papers; 2. A lawyer who once knew a politician; 3. A man in a trying position. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

In politics, as in womanizing, failure is decisive. It sheds its retrospective gloom on earlier endeavor which at the time seemed full of promise. - Malcolm Muggeridge

The best way to lose weight is to close your mouth - something very difficult for a politician. Or watch your food - just watch it, don't eat it. - Edward I Kock


see also   Government,  History  &  Politics  Sections
Hillary in 2007:  Democrat Gift
Bill & Hillary in 2009:  Clinton Combo Kitchen Tool Set

America’s Moment of Truth
Bucket of Hillary
Da Queen
Donald Trump White House
First Dog
Happy Scary Halloween
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30-Nov-2020