Redneck Leaf Blower

An oak is not felled at one blow. - Spanish Proverb

Nature abhors a vacuum. And so do I. - Anne Gibbons

When your dreams turn to dust, vacuum. - Desmond Tutu

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower. - Albert Camus

With time and patience, the mulberry leaf becomes satin. - Chinese Proverb

A brand new vacuum cleaner with all the latest attractions - Archie Bunker

Preoccupied with a single leaf you won't see the tree. - Vagabond

Never take a job where winter winds can blow up your pants. - Geraldo Rivera

Let the wind blow through your hair while you still have some. - Dave Weinbaum

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

A leaf of grass is no less than the journey-work of the stars. - Walt Whitman

If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky? - Stanislaw J. Lec

The name of a man is a numbing blow from which he never recovers. - Marshall McLuhan

I will clean house when Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner. - Roseanne Barr

A best friend is like a four leaf clover: hard to find, lucky to have. - Unknown

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Spaghetti can be eaten most successfully if you inhale it like a vacuum cleaner. - Sophia Loren

Let your life lightly dance on the edges of time, like dew on the tip of a leaf. - Unknown

The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf. - Mark Twain

When opportunity knocks, some people are in the backyard looking for four-leaf clovers. - Polish Proverb

I do benefits for all religions - I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality. - Bob Hope

You know how to whistle, don't you, Steve? You just put your lips together and blow. - To Have and Have Not

Life, if you're fat, is a minefield - you have to pick your way, otherwise you blow up. - Miriam Margolyes

Every time you tear a leaf off a calendar, you present a new place for new ideas and progress. - Charles Kettering

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

Our Lord has written the promise of the resurrection, not in books alone but in every leaf in springtime. - Martin Luther

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

Beware of the man who does not return your blow: he neither forgives you nor allows you to forgive yourself. - George Bernard Shaw

It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace

Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower. - Elayne Boosler

You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.' - Jerry Seinfeld

There are two kinds of people who blow through life like a breeze,
And one kind is gossipers, and the other kind is gossipees. - Ogden Nash

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

I have a maple leaf tattoo over my heart, quite literally, and my two favorite things on Earth are being in Canada and making movies. - Jay Baruchel

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

You have to have a vision. It's got to be a vision you articulate clearly and forcefully. You can't blow an uncertain trumpet. - Rev. Theodore Hesburgh

Nature will bear the closest inspection. She invites us to lay our eye level with her smallest leaf, and take an insect view of its plain. - Henry David Thoreau