Alcohol Test

Free online portable breathalyzer



If you pass this alcohol test, you can keep drinking,
if not, it’s time to stop.
Follow the simple instructions below:

1. Click on the man’s nose.
2. A new window will open - click on the man’s nose again.
3. For each time you click on his nose, you can drink another beer,
glass of wine, or your favourite hard drink.

Man swatting at an annoying fly

QuotaBills
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

In wine, there is truth. - Pliny the Elder

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning

Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. - Robert Fripp

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu

Liquor talks mighty loud when it gets loose from the jug. - Joel C Harris

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

Alcoholic: A person you don't like who drinks as much as you do - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks. - George Burns

Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway

Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster


see also   Alcohol  Section
Alcohol Research
Alcohol Warning
Be Anything You Want
Dog Beer Conversion
How Tequila Works
If Alcohol Talked
New Wine For Seniors
One Beer A Day
Wine Aerobics
Wine Bibber

 

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20-Jan-2022