Several days ago as I left a meeting at a hotel, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down.
I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.
Suddenly I realized I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot.
My husband has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. His theory is that the car will be stolen.
As I burst through the door, I came to a terrifying conclusion. His theory was right. The parking lot was empty.
I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen.
Then I made the most difficult call of all, “Honey,” I stammered. (I always call him “honey” in times like these)
“I left my keys in the car and it’s been stolen.”
There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard his voice.
“Are you kidding’ me”, he barked, “I dropped you off!!!”
Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, “Well, come and get me.”
He retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this cop I didn’t steal your car.”
Yep it’s the Golden Years...
Not all those who wander are lost. - JRR Tolkien
Forget injuries; never forget kindness. - Confucius
One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory. - Rita Mae Brown
Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson
Can you really forgive if you can't forget? - Sarah J Parker
Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names. - John F Kennedy
The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren
Every hour of lost time is a chance of future misfortune. - Napoleon
Technology: to create new hungers to help us forget old ones. - Neil Postman
Living is using time given to you. You cannot recall lost time. - Pokemon
When you make weirdness into a puzzle to be solved, you make LOST. - Joseph Fink
We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti
I can forget and you can forget, but a piece of paper never forgets. - Unknown
The arrogance of the present is to forget the intelligence of the past. - Ken Burns
'Tis better to have fought and lost than never to have fought at all. - Arthur Hugh Clough
He who does not remember the past is condemned to forget where he parked. - David Rudnitsky
A man that is young in years may be old in hours, if he has lost no time. - Francis Bacon
No star is lost once we have seen; We always may be what we might have been. - Adelaide Proctor
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. - Groucho Marx
Dinner and a movie? Forget that. I'd rather have a picnic and a waterfall. - Amanda Grace
You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy
I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best
Never forget that it is not a pneumonia, but a pneumonic man who is your patient. - William Withey Gull
Forget all the reasons it won't work and believe the one reason that it will. - Unknown
I'd say that the Meathead probably got magnesia and forgot where his mouth was. - Archie Bunker
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. - Mark Twain
The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities. - Stephen Covey
The key to making things affordable is design and technology improvements, as well as scale. - Elon Musk
The key to growth is the introduction of higher dimensions of consciousness into our awareness. - Lao Tzu
Madness is loving the unsolvable puzzle of your soul and replacing the lost pieces with my own. - Shannon L. Alder
Men must be taught as if you taught them not,
And things unknown proposed as things forgot. - Alexander Pope
A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries
Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson
I will never forget my actions. They will haunt me for the rest of my life. None of it will happen again. - Garth Drabinsky
Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy
Initiative is key. Anybody who wants to be somebody is going to work as hard as they can to fulfill that dream. - Unknown
For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi
The best way to become a successful writer is to read good writing, remember it, and then forget where you remember it from. - Gene Fowler
Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett
I'm going to make people happy. I'm going to make them forget about their cancer. I'm going to make them forget about their diabetes. - Dick Dale
Aging, Marriage, Police & Stress Sections
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Lost and Found
Lost Hyundai of New Brunswick
Lost Unfriendly Cat
USB Lost Memory Stick
Who Lost The Keys?
Do Not Feed The Bears
Does Your Hedgehog Bite?
A Woman's Mind
Nuclear Waste Truck
Filling The Water Truck
2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars
Be Anything You Want
Drama Queen Diary