Santa Elephant

Standing up for Christmas in Africa

Expect slower present delivery in the Serengeti this year





QuotaBills
Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

Gladly accept the gifts of the present hour. - Horace

The elephant can survive only if forests survive. - Mark Shand

The elephant does not limp when walking on thorns. - African Proverb

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue. - Joseph Addison

I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

Before you eat the elephant, make sure you know what parts you want to eat. - Todd Stocker

Those gifts are ever the most acceptable which the giver has made precious. - Ovid

I have a memory like an elephant. I remember every elephant I've ever met. - Herb Caen

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

Women are like elephants to me: nice to look at, but I wouldn't want to own one. - WC Fields

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody. - Maya Angelou

Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old age. - Aristotle

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

The purpose of life is to discover your gifts, and the meaning of life is to give them away. - Martin Seligman

One of the most important gifts we have in television - the ability to heal through laughter. - Soleil M Frye

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx

When asked what gift he wanted for his birthday, the yogi replied: I wish no gifts, only presence. - Unknown

No matter how carefully you stored the lights last year, they will be snarled again this Christmas. - Robert Kirby

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

When you have an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run. - Abraham Lincoln

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

His wallet is more capacious than an elephant's scrotum and just as difficult to get your hands on. - Blackadder

We are each given a limitless capacity to love and attain wisdom. The extent we use these gifts is our choice. - Anthony Douglas

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

We are all born with a grab bag on gifts and gaps. Identify your true talents, then find out how to use them to make money. - Bill O'Reilly

Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple


see also   Christmas,  Elephant  &  Scenery  Sections
Bird Stocking
Christmas Balls
Christmas Budget
Christmas Dinner Made Easy
Christmas Fireplace Tip
Christmas Light Installation
Christmas Pencil Sharpener
Christmas Possessions To Enter Heaven
Forget The Present
Gingerbread Star Wars Walker
Heathen’s Greetings
Jingle Cats’ White Christmas
Merry House
Office Party Grinch
Recession Christmas Tree
Redneck Christmas Sleigh
Santa For Kids
Santa Stop Lights
Santa’s Last Stop For Mexican Food
Saskatchewan Entrepreneur
Save Santa The Trip
Signs of Christmas Everywhere
Texas Hood Ornament
Three Wise Men
Three Wise Women
Walking In A Doggie Wonderland

 

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01-Dec-2020