Job Interview With God

George Bush, Barack Obama and Donald Trump at the Pearly Gates

After passing on, George Bush, Barack Obama and Donald Trump are going for a job interview with God.

God asks Bush, “What do you believe in”?
Bush replies, “I believe in a free economy, a strong America, The American nation and so on ...”
God is impressed by Bush and tells him, “Great, come sit in the chair on my right.”

God goes to Obama and asks, “What do you believe in?”
Obama replies, “I believe in democracy, helping the poor, world peace, etc. .... ”
God is really impressed by Obama and tells him, “Well done, come sit in the chair on my left.”

Finally, God asks Trump, “What do you believe in?”
Trump replied, “I believe you’re sitting in my chair.”



QuotaBills
God help the patient. - Lord Mansfield

Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers

God created man, but I could do better. - Erma Bombeck

God sends meat - the Devil sends cooks. - Charles VI

Black holes are where God divided by zero. - Steven Wright

Miracles happen to those who believe in them. - Unknown

God is not interested in your art but, your heart. - Ifeanyi E. Onuoha

The problem with political jokes is they get elected. - Henry Cate, VII

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

Spring shows what God can do with a drab and dirty world. - Virgil A Kraft

Prayer does not change God, but it changes him who prays. - Soren Kierkegaard

God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh. - Voltaire

We live in a world in which politics has replaced philosophy. - Martin L. Gross

A government is the only known vessel that leaks from the top. - James Reston

I believe in benevolent dictatorship provided I am the dictator. - Richard Branson

The sad duty of politics is to establish justice in a sinful world. - Reinhold Niebuhr

Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week. - Will Rogers

Dr Donne's verses are like the peace of God - they pass all understanding. - James I

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport. - Jonathan Winters

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul. - George Bernard Shaw

Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business. - Tom Robbins

No man can be called friendless when he has God and the companionship of good books. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

If you want to be successful, just meditate, man. God will tell you what people need. - Carlos Santana

Young man, the secret of my success is that at an early age I discovered I was not God. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better. - Andre Gide

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserves it. - Mark Twain

There's nothing like faith in God to help a fellow who gets booted around once in a while. - Jackie Robinson

God puts you on the runway and takes you off the runway. What you do on the runway is up to you. - Unknown

The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have. - Thomas Jefferson

It's triple the Trump this season... I invited my children, Don Jr. and Ivanka into the boardroom. - Donald Trump

I really do believe that God is love, one of deep affection and grace and forgiveness and inspiration. - William P Young

I believe in only one thing: liberty; but I do not believe in liberty enough to want to force it upon anyone. - H L Mencken

I always tole God, "I'm gwine to hole stiddy on you, an' you've got to see me through." - Harriet Tubman

God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing. - C S Lewis

I think people need to be educated to the fact that marijuana is not a drug. Marijuana is a flower. God put it here. - Willie Nelson

Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage. - Ambrose Bierce

If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep. - Will Rogers

I have respect for Senator McCain. I used to like him a lot. I supported him. I raised a lot of money for his campaign against President Obama. - Donald Trump


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29-May-2020