Love Dress

How not to attract your spouse


A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son’s house. She rang the doorbell and walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing; the aroma of perfume filled the room.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the daughter-in-law answered.

“But you’re naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.

“This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law explained.

“Love dress? But you’re naked!”

“My husband loves me to wear this dress,” she explained. “It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can’t get enough of me.”

The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD and laid on the couch! Waiting for her husband to arrive. Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively.

“What are you doing?” he asked.
“This is my love dress,” she whispered, sensually.
“Needs ironing, what’s for dinner?”


QuotaBills
In love, one and one are one. - Jean-Paul Sartre

I'm the Hiroshima of love. - Sylvester Stallone

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none. - William Shakespeare

When love is not madness, it is not love. - Pedro Calderon

Shift from judgment to compassion to love. - Thomas Leonard

I know of only one duty, and that is to love. - Albert Camus

I love my rejection slips. They show me I try. - Sylvia Plath

Love your enemies, for they tell you your faults. - Benjamin Franklin

Plant smiles
Grow laughter
Harvest love - Unknown

Love. Of course, love. Flames for a year, ashes for 30. - Giuseppi di Lampedusa

I just love Chinese food. My favorite dish is number 27. - Clement Attlee

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. - H L Mencken

The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge. - Bertrand Russell

To love and to be loved is the greatest happiness of existence. - Sydney Smith

Perfect love sometimes does not come until the first grandchild. - Welsh Proverb

I enjoy my fun time and everything like that but I love what I do. - Christina Milian

Passion makes the world go round. Love just makes it a safer place. - Ice-T

I would love to voice an animated penguin or platypus at some point. - Jack Falahee

Tenderness is greater proof of love than the most passionate of vows. - Marlene Dietrich

When we cannot get what we love, we must love what is within our reach. - French proverb

People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered. Love them anyway. - Mother Teresa

The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them. - Bill Vaughan

Men have died from time to time, and worms have eaten them - but not for love. - William Shakespeare

Jealousy, that dragon which slays love under the pretence of keeping it alive. - Havelock Ellis

The biggest love affair since Romeo and Juliet is Milton Berle and the audience. - Walter Winchell

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

We waste time looking for the perfect lover, instead of creating the perfect love. - Tom Robbins

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. - Mignon McLaughlin

I actually have a stash of wigs for Halloween. But only for that. Not to play dress-up. - Alexa Vega

Your inner understanding of love can be extended beyond all you have ever known, before. - Eleesha

Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin - it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring. - S.J. Perelman

True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked. - Erich Segal

The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me. - George Bernard Shaw

I love sushi, though I just read something about how you shouldn't eat sushi more than once a week. - Jacqueline Obradors

The foundation stones for a balanced success are honesty, character, integrity, faith, love and loyalty. - Zig Ziglar

Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship. - Oscar Wilde

I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. - Audrey Hepburn

We are not held back by the love we didn't receive in the past, but by the love we're not extending in the present. - Marianne Williamson

Love is always bestowed as a gift - freely, willingly and without expectation. We don't love to be loved; we love to love. - Leo Buscaglia

Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley


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07-Dec-2019