Love Dress

How not to attract your spouse


A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married son’s house. She rang the doorbell and walked in. She was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked. Soft music was playing; the aroma of perfume filled the room.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I’m waiting for my husband to come home from work,” the daughter-in-law answered.

“But you’re naked!” the mother-in-law exclaimed.

“This is my love dress,” the daughter-in-law explained.

“Love dress? But you’re naked!”

“My husband loves me to wear this dress,” she explained. “It excites him to no end. Every time he sees me in this dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for hours on end. He can’t get enough of me.”

The mother-in-law left. When she got home, she undressed, showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put on a romantic CD and laid on the couch! Waiting for her husband to arrive. Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her laying there so provocatively.

“What are you doing?” he asked.
“This is my love dress,” she whispered, sensually.
“Needs ironing, what’s for dinner?”


QuotaBills
Speak low if you speak love. - William Shakespeare

The first duty of love is to listen. - Paul Tillich

Shift from judgment to compassion to love. - Thomas Leonard

Tis brief, my lord... as woman's love. - William Shakespeare

Isn't love the only thing that counts? - Ravi Zacharias

At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet. - Plato

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop. - H L Mencken

Love conquers all things; let us too surrender to love. - Virgil

Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. - Robert Frost

Only the two of us together flying high upon the wings of love. - Jeffrey Osborne

For business, our Internet love affair was a gift from the gods. - Gary Vaynerchuk

I love the spirit of Halloween and the energy that comes with it. - Katharine McPhee

If there's one thing I know it's God does love a good joke. - Hugh Elliott

A man is often too young to marry, but a man is never too old to love. - Finnish Proverb

When we cannot get what we love, we must love what is within our reach. - French proverb

To love what you do and feel it matters - how could anything be more fun? - Katharine Graham

Where we love is home - home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Moderation, honey, in all things but love and chocolate. That's my motto. - Barbara Bretton

We don't believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack. - Marie Ebner Von Eschenbach

Jealousy, that dragon which slays love under the pretence of keeping it alive. - Havelock Ellis

A daughter is someone you laugh with, dream with, and love with all your heart. - Unknown

I knew right away that Rock Hudson was gay when he did not fall in love with me. - Gina Lollobrigida

Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some extent, protects you from age. - Jeanne Moreau

The highest function of love is that it makes the loved one a unique and irreplaceable being. - Tom Robbins

Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. - Oscar Wilde

Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall. A mother's secret hope outlives them all. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Being in love first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. - C S Lewis

I cannot work; I cannot speak; I cannot live or love as I should, unless God's wisdom lights my path. - David Jeremiah

The best portion of a good man's life are the little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love. - William Wordsworth

I'm working on a second cookbook and am working on my love story, 'Black Heels to Tractor Wheels.' - Ree Drummond

I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick

Love is like a puzzle. First it's confusing and frustrating, but when you figure it out, it's a beautiful thing. - Unknown

There's an upside to grandparenthood. You play, you give, you love, then you hand them back and go to an early movie. - Billy Crystal

Sensitive love letters are my specialty: "Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You. P.S. I'm gay." - Homer Simpson

What I love the most about surfing is that it's my first love. It's the first thing I can remember being consumed by. - Stephanie Gilmore

Hosting the Oscars is much like making love to a woman. It's something I only get to do when Billy Crystal is out of town. - Steve Martin

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, because that plane is still on the ground. - Jarod Kintz

Even after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that. It lights the whole sky. - Hafez

Love is like the wild-rose briar, friendship like the holly-tree. The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms, but which will bloom most constantly? - Emily Bronte


see also   Clothing  &  Relationship  Sections
Amsterdam Dress
Ascot Fashion Statement
Beard Fashion
Beetle Fashion
Black Bra Sales
Bread Dress
Creative Clothing
“Dogs R Us” Fashion Show
Feather Fashion
Flower Dress
Flu Fashion
I Love Dad
Love Lost
Paper Wedding Dress
Pop Can Tab Dress
Pour Woman’s Dress
Race Car Wedding Dress
Safe Sex Dress
Scarf Fashion
Sea Through Dress
Shoe Show - Latest Fashion from Italy & Japan
Snake Wrap Dress
Straightjacket Fashion
The Origin of the White Wedding Dress
The Perfect Dress
Wedding Cake Dress
Wedding Dress Dog Train
Wedding Dress For Sale
Wedding Room Dress

 

Get Off Your High Horse

Redneck Towing

Revenge of the Stallion

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Rat Cut

Spot the Hidden Barred Owl

Smoking Hot Body

Billy the Eagle Owl

Star Wars Fisherman

The Devil's Swimming Pool

Pet Dentist

Nuts And Fruitcakes

Spiral Staircase

Scubaru

Nordern Minnesota Yeneral Store

Pigeon Drink

Epic Turban

Healthy Breakfast

Motorcycle Campers

Canadian Banknotes - Extreme Makeover For Toonie
Full list of creditsFacebookTwitterDiggStumbleUponDelicious

04-Dec-2020