Do You Drive A Cataract?

Optometrist-required translation


A Japanese tourist went to a Canadian eye Doctor. After an examination, the Doctor said, “You have a cataract.”

The Japanese tourist shook his head. “Oh no. I have a Rincoln!”


QuotaBills
Logic is in the eye of the logician. - Gloria Steinem

A friend's eye is a good mirror. - Irish Proverb

The eyes have one language everywhere. - George Herbert

One may have good eyes and yet see nothing. - Italian proverb

A rich man is never ugly in the eyes of a girl. - French Proverb

Mediocrity is excellence in the eyes of the mediocre. - Joseph Joubert

You want people to think you live in a pig's eye? - Archie Bunker

Besmooch the family name in the eyes of the community. - Archie Bunker

We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open. - Harry Edwards

If only we could pull out our brain and use only our eyes. - Pablo Picasso

Many are the starrs I see, but in my eye no starr like thee. - English Saying

Menopause in progress: go around and do not make eye contact. - Unknown

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

I've kissed so many women I can do it with my eyes closed. - Henny Youngman

Look a pig in its eyes, and understand the truth behind bacon. - Mango Wodzak

She has the eyes of Caligula, but the mouth of Marilyn Monroe. - Francois Mitterrand

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

What'd ya think, you were gonna pull the wolf over my eyes? - Archie Bunker

Conjunctivitis dot com ... now there's a site for sore eyes. - Tim Vine

Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye. - Helen Keller

It's very strange when the life you never had flashes before your eyes. - Terri Minsky

Certain things catch your eye, but pursue only those that capture the heart. - Indian Proverb

I need the starshine of your heavenly eyes,
After the day's great sun. - Charles Hanson Towne

Being born with a pair of beady eyes was the best thing that ever happened to me. - Lee van Cleef

Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder. - Laurence J Peter

Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal. - Henry Ford

Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. - David Letterman

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

What a blessing it would be if we could open and shut our ears as easily we do our eyes. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

A man's feet should be planted in his country, but his eyes should survey the world. - George Santayana

Our eyes are placed in front because it is more important to look ahead than to look back. - Unknown

I have only one eye, I have a right to be blind sometimes... I really do not see the signal! - Horatio Nelson

Keep your eye out for hot topics and trends. The media is constantly looking for timely stories. - Jim Kukral

Open your eyes that you might see that all things are possible through you (with God's help). - Robert A. Schuller

To my eye, women get sexier around 35. They know a thing or two, and knowledge is always alluring. - Pierce Brosnan

My object in living is to unite
My avocation and my vocation
As my two eyes make one in sight. - Robert Frost

What your mind sees when you close your eyes marks the entrance to an endless universe: your imagination. - Stephen Helmes

It is only with the heart that one can see clearly, for the most essential things are invisible to the eye. - Unknown

When I first open my eyes upon the morning meadows and look out upon the beautiful world, I thank God I am alive. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. - Mark 10:25

Perhaps our eyes need to be washed by our tears once in a while, so that we can see life with a clearer view again. - Alex Tan

That old law about "an eye for an eye" leaves everybody blind. The time is always right to do the right thing. - Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.

I might show facts as plain as day: but, since your eyes are blind, you'd say, 'Where? What?' and turn away. - Christina Rossetti

Anyone can make you smile or cry, but it takes someone special to make you smile when you already have tears in your eyes. - Unknown

A reputation, once damaged, may possibly be repaired, but the world will always keep their eyes on the spot where the crack was. - Joseph Hall

Nothing contributes so much to tranquilize the mind as a steady purpose - a point on which the soul may fix its intellectual eye. - Mary Shelley

I have made the tough decisions, always with an eye toward the bottom line. Perhaps it's time America was run like a business. - Donald Trump

You always feel when you look it straight in the eye that you could have put more into it, could have let yourself go and dug harder. - Emily Carr

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

Those who speak of progression but are afraid of change are self-repressed and therefore unable to reach any further than their eyes can already see. - Criss Jami


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14-Dec-2019