Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!

Use your best Chinese accent when translating English to Chinese


LESSON  ONE

What you 1 from me?

[Lim Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with....]

“1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to pee. But couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away. So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.”

LESSON  TWO

• Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!:   “You have a good sense of humour!”
• Ai Bang Mai Ne:  “I bumped into the coffee table”
• Ai No Pei:  “I got this for free”
• Chin Tu Fat:  “Have you considered a face lift?”
• Dum Gai:   “A stupid or dubm person”
• Dung On Mai Shu:   “I stepped in shog dit”
• Fat He:   “An unattractive person”
• Gun Pao Der:   “An ancient Chinese invention”
• Hao Long Wei Ting:   “When is the bus due?”
• Hia Dei Kum:   “They have arrived”
• Hu Flung Dung:   “Which one of you fertilised the field?”
• Hu Yu Hai Ding:   “Are you harbouring a fugitive?”
• Jan Ne Ka Sun:   “A former late night talk show host”
• Kum Hia Nao:   “I'd like to talk to you ASAP”
• Lao Ze:   “Not very good”
• Lao Ze Sho:   “Obnoxious Fiance”
• Lei Ying Loh:   “Keep out of sight”
• Lei Tsho:   “Midnight television programme”
• Lin Ching:   “An illegal execution”
• Ming Toy:   “Plaything belonging to ancient emperor”
• Moon Lan Ding:   “One small step for man”
• Ne Ahn:   “A lighting fixture used in advertising signs”
• No Bai Nut Ding:   “Your price is too high”
• Noh Pah King:   “Tow-away zone”
• Noh Tsmo King:   “Cigarettes are hazardous to health”
• Noh Wei Ding:   “Keep out of the pond”
• Shai Gai:   “A bashful person”
• Shu Man Go:   “Your body odour is offensive”
• Sum Ting Wong:   “That's not right”
• Tai Ni Bei Bi:   “A premature infant”
• Tai Ni Po Ni:   “A small horse”
• Ten Ding Ba:   “Serving drinks to people”
• Wan Bum Lung:   “A person with TB”
• Wah Shing Kah:   “Cleaning the family car”
• Wai Go Nao:   “Do you really have to leave?”
• Wai So Dim:   “Who turned off the light?”
• Wai Tu Soon:   “A man ahead of his time”
• Wai Yu Kum Nao:   “I thought the meeting was next week”
• Wai Yu Mun Ching:   “I thought you were on a diet?”
• Wai Yu Shao Ting:   “There is no reason to raise your voice”
• Wai Yu Sing Dum Song:   “You know the lyrics to the Macarena?”
• Wai Yu So Tan?:   “Did you go to the beach?”
• Yu Mai Te Tan:   “Your vacation in Hawaii agreed with you”
• Yu So Dim:   “You aren't very bright”
• Yu Stin Ki Pu:   “Your body odour is offensive”


QuotaBills
Life is too short to learn German. - Richard Porson

o be a good loser is to learn how to win. - Carl Sandburg

Failure is not failure if you learn from it. - Unknown

What we learn with pleasure we never forget. - Alfred Mercier

Whatever is good to know is difficult to learn. - Greek Proverb

By listening, marketing will re-learn how to talk. - David Weinberger

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Bulldozing: Going to sleep during a political speech. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is best to learn wisdom by the experience of others. - Latin Proverb

The day you stop learning is the day you begin decaying. - Isaac Asimov

My joy in learning is partly that it enables me to teach. - Seneca

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

I realized my mission in life was to learn more, not earn more. - Surya Das

If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. - Wilfred Sheed

Continue to learn and challenge yourself. The hard work will pay off. - Unknown

The fine art of preparing sushi is something that you watch and learn. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Do not be embarrassed by your failures, learn from them and start again. - Richard Branson

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

I am convinced that the best learning takes place when the learner takes charge. - Seymour Papert

If you cannot understand me in my speech, how can you understand me in my silence? - Ravi Zacharias

No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The more you learn about the dignity of the gorilla, the more you want to avoid people. - Dian Fossey

A little learning is a dangerous thing
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring. - Alexander Pope

There are no mistakes, no coincidences. All events are blessings given to us to learn from. - Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

All men should strive to learn before they die, what they are running from, and to, and why. - James Thurber

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

Bountiful: What Captain Bligh declared after learning that one more breadfruit tree would sink his ship - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Yes, it's absolutely true that anything worth doing is worth doing poorly - until you can learn to do it well. - Zig Ziglar

Music expresses feeling and thought, without language; it was below and before speech, and it is above and beyond all words. - Robert G Ingersoll

Every dad, if he takes time out of his busy life to reflect upon his fatherhood, can learn ways to become an even better dad. - Jack Baker

Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is. - Maxim Gorky

Charity, good behaviour, amiable speech, unselfishness - these by the chief sage have been declared the elements of popularity. - Burmese Proverb

I can't swim. I can't drive, either. I was going to learn to drive but then I thought, well, what if I crash into a lake? - Dylan Moran

The symbolic language of the crucifixion is the death of the old paradigm; resurrection is a leap into a whole new way of thinking. - Deepak Chopra

I remind myself every morning: nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So if I'm going to learn, I must do it by listening. - Larry King

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton

Every job I do, I like to think it makes me better, or I learn things. It's all about how much something's going to stretch me or test me. - Daniel Radcliffe

To be a champion, you have to learn to handle stress and pressure. But if you've prepared mentally and physically, you don't have to worry. - Harvey Mackay


see also   Confucius,  Daffynitions  &  Language  Sections
“Books Never Written”
Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Fuxing Lu
No Fee Chinese Detective

 

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17-Oct-2021