Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!

Use your best Chinese accent when translating English to Chinese


LESSON  ONE

What you 1 from me?

[Lim Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with....]

“1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to pee. But couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away. So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.”

LESSON  TWO

• Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!:   “You have a good sense of humour!”
• Ai Bang Mai Ne:  “I bumped into the coffee table”
• Ai No Pei:  “I got this for free”
• Chin Tu Fat:  “Have you considered a face lift?”
• Dum Gai:   “A stupid or dubm person”
• Dung On Mai Shu:   “I stepped in shog dit”
• Fat He:   “An unattractive person”
• Gun Pao Der:   “An ancient Chinese invention”
• Hao Long Wei Ting:   “When is the bus due?”
• Hia Dei Kum:   “They have arrived”
• Hu Flung Dung:   “Which one of you fertilised the field?”
• Hu Yu Hai Ding:   “Are you harbouring a fugitive?”
• Jan Ne Ka Sun:   “A former late night talk show host”
• Kum Hia Nao:   “I'd like to talk to you ASAP”
• Lao Ze:   “Not very good”
• Lao Ze Sho:   “Obnoxious Fiance”
• Lei Ying Loh:   “Keep out of sight”
• Lei Tsho:   “Midnight television programme”
• Lin Ching:   “An illegal execution”
• Ming Toy:   “Plaything belonging to ancient emperor”
• Moon Lan Ding:   “One small step for man”
• Ne Ahn:   “A lighting fixture used in advertising signs”
• No Bai Nut Ding:   “Your price is too high”
• Noh Pah King:   “Tow-away zone”
• Noh Tsmo King:   “Cigarettes are hazardous to health”
• Noh Wei Ding:   “Keep out of the pond”
• Shai Gai:   “A bashful person”
• Shu Man Go:   “Your body odour is offensive”
• Sum Ting Wong:   “That's not right”
• Tai Ni Bei Bi:   “A premature infant”
• Tai Ni Po Ni:   “A small horse”
• Ten Ding Ba:   “Serving drinks to people”
• Wan Bum Lung:   “A person with TB”
• Wah Shing Kah:   “Cleaning the family car”
• Wai Go Nao:   “Do you really have to leave?”
• Wai So Dim:   “Who turned off the light?”
• Wai Tu Soon:   “A man ahead of his time”
• Wai Yu Kum Nao:   “I thought the meeting was next week”
• Wai Yu Mun Ching:   “I thought you were on a diet?”
• Wai Yu Shao Ting:   “There is no reason to raise your voice”
• Wai Yu Sing Dum Song:   “You know the lyrics to the Macarena?”
• Wai Yu So Tan?:   “Did you go to the beach?”
• Yu Mai Te Tan:   “Your vacation in Hawaii agreed with you”
• Yu So Dim:   “You aren't very bright”
• Yu Stin Ki Pu:   “Your body odour is offensive”


QuotaBills
We teach what we need to learn. - Gloria Steinem

A man may learn wisdom even from a foe. - Aristophenes

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

One must be a wise reader to quote wisely and well. - Amos Bronson Alcott

To love others, we must first learn to love ourselves. - Unknown

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

My joy in learning is partly that it enables me to teach. - Seneca

All poetry is a reproduction of the tones of actual speech. - Robert Frost

I look like I'm Chinese or Thai or Japanese - very different. - Mary Kom

Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other. - Edmund Burke

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

The Republic of China - back in the Olympic Games for the first time. - David Coleman

A man must learn to endure patiently what he cannot avoid conveniently. - Michel de Montaigne

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. - Mark Twain

I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught. - Winston Churchill

I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China. - Rob Lowe

Learn from yesterday, live for today, look to tomorrow, rest this afternoon. - Charles M. Schulz

Learning to let go of guilt and forgive yourself is part of emotional growth. - Unknown

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect. - Owens L. Pomeroy

We really have everything in common with America nowadays except, of course, language. - Oscar Wilde

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

I am a writer of books in retrospect. I talk in order to understand; I teach in order to learn. - Robert Frost

Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself, and know that everything in this life has purpose. - Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay

The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.999 percent of them are made by people who are still alive. - Joshua Bruns

Our life's a stage, a comedy: either learn to play and take it lightly, or bear its troubles patiently. - Palladas

If I'm ever to reach any understanding of myself and the things around me, I must learn to stand alone. - Henrik Ibsen

You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself. - Unknown

Failure is instructive. People who really think learn quite as much from their failures as from their successes. - John Dewey

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

Mistakes are the stepping stones to wisdom. We learn from trial and error; we become wise by understanding problems. - Leon Brown

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

People shop and learn in a whole new way compared to just a few years ago, so marketers need to adapt or risk extinction. - Brian Halligan

Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt

Charity, good behaviour, amiable speech, unselfishness - these by the chief sage have been declared the elements of popularity. - Burmese Proverb

Worrying is the most natural and spontaneous of all human functions. It is time to acknowledge this, perhaps even to learn to do it better. - Lewis Thomas

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Do not train boys to learning by force and harshness, but lead them by what amuses them, so that they may better discover the bent of their minds. - Plato


see also   Confucius,  Daffynitions  &  Language  Sections
“Books Never Written”
Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Fuxing Lu
No Fee Chinese Detective

 

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29-Jan-2020