Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!

Use your best Chinese accent when translating English to Chinese


LESSON  ONE

What you 1 from me?

[Lim Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with....]

“1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to pee. But couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away. So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.”

LESSON  TWO

• Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!:   “You have a good sense of humour!”
• Ai Bang Mai Ne:  “I bumped into the coffee table”
• Ai No Pei:  “I got this for free”
• Chin Tu Fat:  “Have you considered a face lift?”
• Dum Gai:   “A stupid or dubm person”
• Dung On Mai Shu:   “I stepped in shog dit”
• Fat He:   “An unattractive person”
• Gun Pao Der:   “An ancient Chinese invention”
• Hao Long Wei Ting:   “When is the bus due?”
• Hia Dei Kum:   “They have arrived”
• Hu Flung Dung:   “Which one of you fertilised the field?”
• Hu Yu Hai Ding:   “Are you harbouring a fugitive?”
• Jan Ne Ka Sun:   “A former late night talk show host”
• Kum Hia Nao:   “I'd like to talk to you ASAP”
• Lao Ze:   “Not very good”
• Lao Ze Sho:   “Obnoxious Fiance”
• Lei Ying Loh:   “Keep out of sight”
• Lei Tsho:   “Midnight television programme”
• Lin Ching:   “An illegal execution”
• Ming Toy:   “Plaything belonging to ancient emperor”
• Moon Lan Ding:   “One small step for man”
• Ne Ahn:   “A lighting fixture used in advertising signs”
• No Bai Nut Ding:   “Your price is too high”
• Noh Pah King:   “Tow-away zone”
• Noh Tsmo King:   “Cigarettes are hazardous to health”
• Noh Wei Ding:   “Keep out of the pond”
• Shai Gai:   “A bashful person”
• Shu Man Go:   “Your body odour is offensive”
• Sum Ting Wong:   “That's not right”
• Tai Ni Bei Bi:   “A premature infant”
• Tai Ni Po Ni:   “A small horse”
• Ten Ding Ba:   “Serving drinks to people”
• Wan Bum Lung:   “A person with TB”
• Wah Shing Kah:   “Cleaning the family car”
• Wai Go Nao:   “Do you really have to leave?”
• Wai So Dim:   “Who turned off the light?”
• Wai Tu Soon:   “A man ahead of his time”
• Wai Yu Kum Nao:   “I thought the meeting was next week”
• Wai Yu Mun Ching:   “I thought you were on a diet?”
• Wai Yu Shao Ting:   “There is no reason to raise your voice”
• Wai Yu Sing Dum Song:   “You know the lyrics to the Macarena?”
• Wai Yu So Tan?:   “Did you go to the beach?”
• Yu Mai Te Tan:   “Your vacation in Hawaii agreed with you”
• Yu So Dim:   “You aren't very bright”
• Yu Stin Ki Pu:   “Your body odour is offensive”


QuotaBills
Mother lode of learning. - Neal A Maxwell

Learn what you are and be such. - Pindar

Speech is the small change of silence. - George Meredith

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

Learn to hold loosely all that is not eternal. - A. Maude Royden

The English never draw a line without blurring it. - Winston Churchill

To love others, we must first learn to love ourselves. - Unknown

If you learn from defeat, you haven't really lost. - Zig Ziglar

Who questions much, shall learn much, and retain much. - Francis Bacon

A fool is known by his speech; and a wise man by silence. - Pythagoras

Leadership is the capacity to translate vision into reality. - Warren G Bennis

I am learning all the time. The tombstone will be my diploma. - Eartha Kitt

He who has imagination without learning, has wings and no feet. - Joseph Joubert

The quickest way to become an old dog is to stop learning new tricks. - John Rooney

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century. - Lewis Perelman

You could listen to Woody Guthrie songs and actually learn how to live. - Bob Dylan

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

Those who love peace must learn to organize as well as those who love war. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

We tend to steer our lives in the direction of the lessons we need to learn. - Don Campbell

The only thing we learn from new elections is we learned nothing from the old. - American Proverb

No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

You don't learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing and falling over. - Richard Branson

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. - Soren Kierkegaard

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. - Ezra Pound

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that, everyone chortles. - Garrison Keillor

Every St. Patrick's Day every Irishman goes out to find another Irishman to make a speech to. - Unknown

The names of colors are at the edge, between where language fails and where it's at its most powerful. - A.S. Byatt

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Yes, it's absolutely true that anything worth doing is worth doing poorly - until you can learn to do it well. - Zig Ziglar

A teacher who is attempting to teach without inspiring the pupil with a desire to learn is hammering on cold iron. - Horace Mann

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized. - Oscar Wilde

Mistakes are the stepping stones to wisdom. We learn from trial and error; we become wise by understanding problems. - Leon Brown

People shop and learn in a whole new way compared to just a few years ago, so marketers need to adapt or risk extinction. - Brian Halligan

It's what I learn from the great actors that I work with. Stillness. That's all and that's the hardest thing. - Morgan Freeman

Irish poets, learn your trade, sing whatever is well made, scorn the sort now growing up all out of shape from toe to top. - William Butler Yeats

We learn wisdom from failure much more than success. We often discover what we will do, by finding out what we will not do. - Samuel Smiles

Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt

I can remember a reporter asking me for a quote, and I didn't know what a quote was. I thought it was some kind of a soft drink. - Joe DiMaggio


see also   Confucius,  Daffynitions  &  Language  Sections
“Books Never Written”
Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Fuxing Lu
No Fee Chinese Detective

 

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18-Jan-2022