Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!

Use your best Chinese accent when translating English to Chinese


LESSON  ONE

What you 1 from me?

[Lim Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with....]

“1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to pee. But couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away. So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.”

LESSON  TWO

• Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!:   “You have a good sense of humour!”
• Ai Bang Mai Ne:  “I bumped into the coffee table”
• Ai No Pei:  “I got this for free”
• Chin Tu Fat:  “Have you considered a face lift?”
• Dum Gai:   “A stupid or dubm person”
• Dung On Mai Shu:   “I stepped in shog dit”
• Fat He:   “An unattractive person”
• Gun Pao Der:   “An ancient Chinese invention”
• Hao Long Wei Ting:   “When is the bus due?”
• Hia Dei Kum:   “They have arrived”
• Hu Flung Dung:   “Which one of you fertilised the field?”
• Hu Yu Hai Ding:   “Are you harbouring a fugitive?”
• Jan Ne Ka Sun:   “A former late night talk show host”
• Kum Hia Nao:   “I'd like to talk to you ASAP”
• Lao Ze:   “Not very good”
• Lao Ze Sho:   “Obnoxious Fiance”
• Lei Ying Loh:   “Keep out of sight”
• Lei Tsho:   “Midnight television programme”
• Lin Ching:   “An illegal execution”
• Ming Toy:   “Plaything belonging to ancient emperor”
• Moon Lan Ding:   “One small step for man”
• Ne Ahn:   “A lighting fixture used in advertising signs”
• No Bai Nut Ding:   “Your price is too high”
• Noh Pah King:   “Tow-away zone”
• Noh Tsmo King:   “Cigarettes are hazardous to health”
• Noh Wei Ding:   “Keep out of the pond”
• Shai Gai:   “A bashful person”
• Shu Man Go:   “Your body odour is offensive”
• Sum Ting Wong:   “That's not right”
• Tai Ni Bei Bi:   “A premature infant”
• Tai Ni Po Ni:   “A small horse”
• Ten Ding Ba:   “Serving drinks to people”
• Wan Bum Lung:   “A person with TB”
• Wah Shing Kah:   “Cleaning the family car”
• Wai Go Nao:   “Do you really have to leave?”
• Wai So Dim:   “Who turned off the light?”
• Wai Tu Soon:   “A man ahead of his time”
• Wai Yu Kum Nao:   “I thought the meeting was next week”
• Wai Yu Mun Ching:   “I thought you were on a diet?”
• Wai Yu Shao Ting:   “There is no reason to raise your voice”
• Wai Yu Sing Dum Song:   “You know the lyrics to the Macarena?”
• Wai Yu So Tan?:   “Did you go to the beach?”
• Yu Mai Te Tan:   “Your vacation in Hawaii agreed with you”
• Yu So Dim:   “You aren't very bright”
• Yu Stin Ki Pu:   “Your body odour is offensive”


QuotaBills
Listen to learn. Learn to earn! - Rob Liano

A man may learn wisdom even from a foe. - Aristophenes

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. - Thomas Carlyle

Thought, unassisted by learning, is dangerous. - Confucius

It is better to know how to learn than to know. - Dr. Seuss

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know. - Bill Watterson

He speaks English, Spanish, and he's bilingual too. - Don King

First learn the meaning of what you say, and then speak. - Epictetus

We learn from history that we do not learn from history. - Georg W F Hegel

The surest way to make a monkey out of a man is to quote him. - Robert Benchley

Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere. - Chinese Proverb

Don't try to make me consistent. I am learning all the time. - R Buckminster Fuller

Somehow we learn who we really are and then live with that decision. - Eleanor Roosevelt

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

Try to learn something about everything and everything about something. - Thomas Henry Huxley

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you. - B.B. King

The man who never makes mistakes loses a great many chances to learn something. - Unknown

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

There's nothing like an English weirdo. We have the best nutters in the world. - Sharon Osbourne

The language of the law must not be foreign to the ears of those who are to obey it. - Learned hand

Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect. - Owens L. Pomeroy

If a child can't learn the way we teach, maybe we should teach the way they learn. - Ignacio Estrada

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that, everyone chortles. - Garrison Keillor

The first man to use abusive language instead of his fists was the founder of civilization. - Sigmund Freud

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can never live long enough to make them all yourself. - Groucho Marx

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

The audience, upon learning that the real Buffalo Bill was present, gave several cheers between the acts. - Buffalo Bill

You learn how to be book smart in school, but you better not forget that you also need to be street smart. - Harvey Mackay

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

He who would learn to fly on day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance; one cannot fly into flying. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus


see also   Confucius,  Daffynitions  &  Language  Sections
“Books Never Written”
Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Fuxing Lu
No Fee Chinese Detective

 

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08-Aug-2020