Learn Chinese In 5 Minutes!

Use your best Chinese accent when translating English to Chinese


LESSON  ONE

What you 1 from me?

[Lim Ah Lek was asked to make a sentence using 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 and 10. Not only did he do it 1 to 10, he did it again from 10 back to 1. This is what he came up with....]

“1 day I go 2 climb up a 3 outside a house to pee. But couple saw me, so I panic and 4 down. The man rush out and wanted to 5 with me. I run until I fall 6 and throw up. So I go into 7 eleven and grab some 8 to throw at him. Then I took a 9 and try to stab him. 10 God he run away. So, I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and left 7 eleven. Next day, I call my boss and say I am 6. He said 5, tomorrow also no need to come back 4 work. He also ask me to climb a 3 and jump down. I don't understand, I so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.”

LESSON  TWO

• Ah Tink Yu Fa Ni!:   “You have a good sense of humour!”
• Ai Bang Mai Ne:  “I bumped into the coffee table”
• Ai No Pei:  “I got this for free”
• Chin Tu Fat:  “Have you considered a face lift?”
• Dum Gai:   “A stupid or dubm person”
• Dung On Mai Shu:   “I stepped in shog dit”
• Fat He:   “An unattractive person”
• Gun Pao Der:   “An ancient Chinese invention”
• Hao Long Wei Ting:   “When is the bus due?”
• Hia Dei Kum:   “They have arrived”
• Hu Flung Dung:   “Which one of you fertilised the field?”
• Hu Yu Hai Ding:   “Are you harbouring a fugitive?”
• Jan Ne Ka Sun:   “A former late night talk show host”
• Kum Hia Nao:   “I'd like to talk to you ASAP”
• Lao Ze:   “Not very good”
• Lao Ze Sho:   “Obnoxious Fiance”
• Lei Ying Loh:   “Keep out of sight”
• Lei Tsho:   “Midnight television programme”
• Lin Ching:   “An illegal execution”
• Ming Toy:   “Plaything belonging to ancient emperor”
• Moon Lan Ding:   “One small step for man”
• Ne Ahn:   “A lighting fixture used in advertising signs”
• No Bai Nut Ding:   “Your price is too high”
• Noh Pah King:   “Tow-away zone”
• Noh Tsmo King:   “Cigarettes are hazardous to health”
• Noh Wei Ding:   “Keep out of the pond”
• Shai Gai:   “A bashful person”
• Shu Man Go:   “Your body odour is offensive”
• Sum Ting Wong:   “That's not right”
• Tai Ni Bei Bi:   “A premature infant”
• Tai Ni Po Ni:   “A small horse”
• Ten Ding Ba:   “Serving drinks to people”
• Wan Bum Lung:   “A person with TB”
• Wah Shing Kah:   “Cleaning the family car”
• Wai Go Nao:   “Do you really have to leave?”
• Wai So Dim:   “Who turned off the light?”
• Wai Tu Soon:   “A man ahead of his time”
• Wai Yu Kum Nao:   “I thought the meeting was next week”
• Wai Yu Mun Ching:   “I thought you were on a diet?”
• Wai Yu Shao Ting:   “There is no reason to raise your voice”
• Wai Yu Sing Dum Song:   “You know the lyrics to the Macarena?”
• Wai Yu So Tan?:   “Did you go to the beach?”
• Yu Mai Te Tan:   “Your vacation in Hawaii agreed with you”
• Yu So Dim:   “You aren't very bright”
• Yu Stin Ki Pu:   “Your body odour is offensive”


QuotaBills
Mother lode of learning. - Neal A Maxwell

Speech is silver; silence is golden. - Thomas Carlyle

What we learn to do, we learn by doing. - Aristotle

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

Thought, unassisted by learning, is dangerous. - Confucius

If you learn from defeat, you haven't really lost. - Zig Ziglar

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. - Robert Benchley

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit. - W Somerset Maugham

You can learn a line from a win and a book from a defeat. - Paul Brown

Failure is just another way to learn how to do something right. - Marian Wright Edelman

Learn to value yourself, which means: fight for your happiness. - Ayn Rand

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

Silence is the language of God; it is also the language of the heart. - Sivananda

A man must learn to endure patiently what he cannot avoid conveniently. - Michel de Montaigne

The English are not an inventive people; they don't eat enough pie. - Thomas Edison

Your mind is your instrument. Learn to be its master and not its slave. - Unknown

We're all learning here; the best listeners will end up the smartest. - Charlene Li

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

Sometimes the hardest part isn't letting go but rather learning to start over. - Nicole Sobon

To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize. - Voltaire

You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. - Franklin P. Adams

There's nothing like an English weirdo. We have the best nutters in the world. - Sharon Osbourne

I think of myself as being Jewish and Irish, despite the fact that I'm English. - Daniel Radcliffe

Bad times have a scientific value. We learn geology the morning after the earthquake. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Learn to say 'no.' It will be of more use to you than to be able to read Latin. - Charles H Spurgeon

I learn things from my kids constantly. Most of their knowledge comes from Snapple caps. - Jimmy Kimmel

The funniest line in English is "Get it?" When you say that, everyone chortles. - Garrison Keillor

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

A person's name is, to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language. - Dale Carnegie

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

If we do not believe in freedom of speech for those we despise, we do not believe in it at all. - Noam Chomsky

Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself, and know that everything in this life has purpose. - Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Want to learn to eat a lot? Here it is: Eat a little. That way, you will be around long enough to eat a lot. - Tony Robbins

That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons of history. - Aldous Huxley

Grammar: 1. Lives with granpar; 2. The difference between Feeling Your Nuts and Feeling You’re Nuts. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's what I learn from the great actors that I work with. Stillness. That's all and that's the hardest thing. - Morgan Freeman

We learn wisdom from failure much more than success. We often discover what we will do, by finding out what we will not do. - Samuel Smiles

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

Life doesn't make any sense without interdependence. We need each other, and the sooner we learn that, the better for us all. - Erik Erikson

Every job I do, I like to think it makes me better, or I learn things. It's all about how much something's going to stretch me or test me. - Daniel Radcliffe


see also   Confucius,  Daffynitions  &  Language  Sections
“Books Never Written”
Chinese Law School
Chinese Proverbs
Chinese Shoelusion
Chinese Sudoku
Chinese to English Translation
Chu Your Food Well
Fortune Cookies - In Bed
Fuxing Lu
No Fee Chinese Detective

 

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07-Jul-2022