My husband isn’t happy with my mood swings.
The other day, he bought me a mood ring so he would be able to monitor my moods.
When I’m in a good mood, it turns green.
When I’m in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead.
Maybe next time he’ll buy me a diamond.
Big girls need big diamonds. - Elizabeth Taylor
Wear your diamonds on the inside. - Megan Dodds
Diamonds are forever, my youth is not. - Jill St John
Some people value sentiments over diamonds. - Cassandra Clare
I ain't in no mood to play 120 questions. - Archie Bunker
Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without. - Confucius
Diamonds are only lumps of coal that stuck to their jobs. - Malcolm Forbes
A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor
I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. - Zsa Zsa Gabor
Menopause in progress: go around and do not make eye contact. - Unknown
It is better to have old secondhand diamonds than none at all. - Mark Twain
Adversity is the diamond dust Heaven polishes its jewels with. - Thomas Carlyle
Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes
Rappers wear diamonds to compensate for a lack of fashion sense. - Asap Rocky
A gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself. - Mae West
A diamond with a flaw is better than a common stone that is perfect. - Chinese Proverb
My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London
Proverbs are mental gems gathered in the diamond districts of the mind. - William R. Alger
Colleges are places where pebbles are polished and diamonds are dimmed. - Robert G Ingersoll
A diamond is just a piece of coal that handles stress exceptionally well. - Unknown
It's diamonds in your pockets one week, macaroni and cheese the next. - Jolene Blalock
It's called MENOPAUSE for a reason... MEN should PAUSE before they speak! - Unknown
Next to good judgment, diamonds and pearls are the rarest things in the world. - Jean De La Bruyere
Life without endeavor is like entering a jewel mine and coming out with empty hands. - Japanese Proverb
I don't work out. If God wanted us to bend over, he'd put diamonds on the floor. - Joan Rivers
The most precious jewels you'll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children. - Unknown
I work with gold that holds history, diamonds that see the future, and rubies that long for love. - Waris Ahluwalia
Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown
Every diamond has the ability to shine when there is someone to recognize its good facets and inhibit its flaws. - Wes Fesler
Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown
From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining. - Leonard Bernstein
The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe
My dream is for people around the world to look up and to see Canada like a little jewel sitting at the top of the continent. - Tommy Douglas
Diamond being the toughest thing on the face of earth is still the most prettiest object; pretty is not always being honeyed. - Priyansh Shah
The diamond may adorn royalty, regardless of personal worth; but jewels of thought render even poverty illustrious and sublime. - Gems for the Fireside
A diamond, which is the hardest of stones, not yielding unto steel, emery or any other thing, is yet made soft by the blood of a goat. - Thomas Browne
No sign of pleasure greeted the announcement. The mood in the hall was leaden.
My mood was livelier. Fright is livelier than lead. - Gail Carson Levine
I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene
Every essential oil has a healing purpose. I think it's a great gift because it's something that elevates your mood and your health. - Yolanda Hadid
The more the diamond is cut the brighter it sparkles; and in what seems hard dealing, there God has no end in view but to perfect His people. - Thomas Guthrie
Wear your diamonds on the inside. - Megan Dodds
Diamonds are forever, my youth is not. - Jill St John
Some people value sentiments over diamonds. - Cassandra Clare
I ain't in no mood to play 120 questions. - Archie Bunker
Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without. - Confucius
Diamonds are only lumps of coal that stuck to their jobs. - Malcolm Forbes
A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor
I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. - Zsa Zsa Gabor
Menopause in progress: go around and do not make eye contact. - Unknown
It is better to have old secondhand diamonds than none at all. - Mark Twain
Adversity is the diamond dust Heaven polishes its jewels with. - Thomas Carlyle
Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes
Rappers wear diamonds to compensate for a lack of fashion sense. - Asap Rocky
A gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself. - Mae West
A diamond with a flaw is better than a common stone that is perfect. - Chinese Proverb
My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings. - Jay London
Proverbs are mental gems gathered in the diamond districts of the mind. - William R. Alger
Colleges are places where pebbles are polished and diamonds are dimmed. - Robert G Ingersoll
A diamond is just a piece of coal that handles stress exceptionally well. - Unknown
It's diamonds in your pockets one week, macaroni and cheese the next. - Jolene Blalock
It's called MENOPAUSE for a reason... MEN should PAUSE before they speak! - Unknown
Next to good judgment, diamonds and pearls are the rarest things in the world. - Jean De La Bruyere
Life without endeavor is like entering a jewel mine and coming out with empty hands. - Japanese Proverb
I don't work out. If God wanted us to bend over, he'd put diamonds on the floor. - Joan Rivers
The most precious jewels you'll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children. - Unknown
I work with gold that holds history, diamonds that see the future, and rubies that long for love. - Waris Ahluwalia
Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown
Every diamond has the ability to shine when there is someone to recognize its good facets and inhibit its flaws. - Wes Fesler
Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown
From New Year's on the outlook brightens; good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining. - Leonard Bernstein
The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe
My dream is for people around the world to look up and to see Canada like a little jewel sitting at the top of the continent. - Tommy Douglas
Diamond being the toughest thing on the face of earth is still the most prettiest object; pretty is not always being honeyed. - Priyansh Shah
The diamond may adorn royalty, regardless of personal worth; but jewels of thought render even poverty illustrious and sublime. - Gems for the Fireside
A diamond, which is the hardest of stones, not yielding unto steel, emery or any other thing, is yet made soft by the blood of a goat. - Thomas Browne
No sign of pleasure greeted the announcement. The mood in the hall was leaden.
My mood was livelier. Fright is livelier than lead. - Gail Carson Levine
I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene
Every essential oil has a healing purpose. I think it's a great gift because it's something that elevates your mood and your health. - Yolanda Hadid
The more the diamond is cut the brighter it sparkles; and in what seems hard dealing, there God has no end in view but to perfect His people. - Thomas Guthrie
see also Relationiship & Shopping Sections
7 Dwarfs of Menopause
Menopause Sucks
 Religious Nuts |  Funnel Farm |  Urinal Challenge |  Snow Detour |  Redneck GPS |
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24-Jan-2021 |