Q: Where does Valentine’s Day come after Easter? Valentine's Day is the poet's holiday. - Ted Kooser I claim there ain't another Saint as great as Valentine. - Ogden Nash Valentine hearts beat more passionately than everyday hearts. - Unknown Valentine's Day is like Armistice Day - you declare a truce. - Milton Berle Without Valentine's Day, February would be... well, January. - Jim Gaffigan Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day. - Jay Leno Valentine's day without your love is like a year without the Internet. - Santosh Kalwar Valentine's Day is the day when you remember that Cupid was a lousy shot. - Milton Berle She was nice to him on Valentine's Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash. - Milton Berle Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine. - Christopher Plummer I'm like the kid in kindergarten; I really do send valentines to everyone. - Susie Bright All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express. - Milton Berle Oh, if it be to choose and call thee mine, love, thou art every day my Valentine! - Thomas Hood If my Valentine you won't be, I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway To the romantic soul, the rituals of Valentine's Day echo every day of the year. - Richelle E. Goodrich On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse. - Milton Berle Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife. - Milton Berle The only thing that can break a piece of Valentine candy is another piece of Valentine candy. - Milton Berle Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th. - David Letterman I love Valentine's Day! I love it, I love it, I love it. I like having doors opened for me. - Ginnifer Goodwin My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay. - Milton Berle Why buy flowers for Valentine's Day? Just go to a cemetery and collect a dozen off a few graves. - Jarod Kintz The thing about Valentine's day is that people discover who are single and who to feel jealous of. - Faye Morgan Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. - Milton Berle My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle This Valentine's Day rent a poem for your loved. They come in three sizes - small, medium, and romantic. Free refills available to Premium Members. - Jarod Kintz My wife sent me a Valentine card that said, "Take my heart, take my lips, take my soul." That's just like her. She kept the good parts for herself. - Milton Berle Non-Muslims in Saudi Arabia can only celebrate Valentine's Day behind closed doors. Apparently, this has led to a huge black market for flowers and wrapping paper. - John Niven Hollywood wanted to change my birthdate. I was born after Valentine's Day, so they wanted to change it to February 14. A Latin lover should be born on Valentine's Day. I said no. - Cesar Romero I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon. - Unknown Valentine's Day is when stores and restaurants get rich, men get lucky, and women fill their pretty faces with chocolate and put up with their man for six seconds at the end of the night. - Unknown see also Relationship & Valentine Sections Chicago Valentine Childhood Romance Crocodial Love Choose Valentine Happy Valentine’s Day to Our New Father Happy vOWLentine’s Day Lawyer’s Valentine Gift My Valentine Perfect Valentines Day Pig Valentine Redneck Valentine Love Poems Religious Valentine Romance Lost She Loves Me ... She Loves Me Not Texas Valentine Unhappy Valentine’s Day Valentine Heart Valentine Love & Hisses Valentine Not Valentine One Liners Valentine Riddles Valentine Splash Valentine’s Day Dinner Valentine’s Day Trivia Vera Valentine |
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