Almost Everything’s Bigger in Texas

Home on the Range for an Aussie


A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation and meets an Aussie farmer.

The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh? We have wheat fields that are at least twice at large!”

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, “We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows.”

The conversation almost dies when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field.

He asks, “And what are those?”

The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, “Don’t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?”


QuotaBills
Big girls need big diamonds. - Elizabeth Taylor

To die will be an awfully big adventure. - James M Barrie

I've been big ever since I was little. - William Perry

VR and AR are going to be a really big deal. - Mark Zuckerberg

Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown

I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. - Molly Ivins

Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference. - Winston Churchill

Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win. - Jonathan Kozol

There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose. - Oscar Wilde

The large print giveth and the small print taketh away. - Unknown

I'm just the smallest dot in a big map of human history. - Ben Casnocha

My bottom is so big it's got its own gravitational field. - Carol Vorderman

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

I also do my own processing, so it means a big commitment in lab time. - Leonard Nimoy

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

My parents are very good examples of Christians. They are big on forgiveness. - James Acaster

There's no problem so big or complicated that it can't be run away from. - Unknown

Everyone should be paid what he is worth, no matter how big a pay cut is involved. - Unknown

Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. - Jensen Ackles

We'll have a big bowl of spaghetti and a plate of some of that veal scallopeepee. - Archie Bunker

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. - Robert Brault

In order to be big, you have to think big. If you think small, you're going to be small. - Emeril Lagasse

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself; I am large, I contain multitudes. - Walt Whitman

For me, part of one my big movements is building authentic street environments for skateboarding. - Rob Dyrdek

A big part of being a well-adjusted person is accepting that you can't be good at everything. - Kelly W Brown

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank. - Woody Allen

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

I really want to play Princess Leia. Stick some big pastries on my head. Now that would be interesting! - Ewan McGregor

America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee

My big focus is China and OPEC and all of these countries that are just absolutely destroying the United States. - Donald Trump

I'll tell you, it's Big Business. If there is one word to describe Atlantic City, it's Big Business. - Donald Trump

When ordinary people decide to step out and be part of something big, that's when they become extraordinary. - Brett Harris

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

The space in a needle's eye is sufficient for two friends, but the whole world is scarcely big enough to hold two enemies. - Solomon Ibn Gabirol

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

Success depends in a very large measure upon individual initiative and exertion, and cannot be achieved except by a dint of hard work. - Anna Pavlova

His mind is concrete and fastidious,
His nose is remarkably big;
His visage is more or less hideous,
His beard it resembles a wig. - Edward Lear

I would rather be in the cycle where people are underestimating us. It gives us latitude to go out and make big bets that excite and amaze people. - Mark Zuckerberg


see also   Farm  Section
Everything Is Bigger In Texas
My Daughter & My Money
Survivor - Texas Style (2013)
Texas Bank Security
Texas Office Chair
Texas Wink
Why We Live in Texas

 

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09-Aug-2020