Almost Everything’s Bigger in Texas

Home on the Range for an Aussie


A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation and meets an Aussie farmer.

The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh? We have wheat fields that are at least twice at large!”

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, “We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows.”

The conversation almost dies when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field.

He asks, “And what are those?”

The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, “Don’t you have any grasshoppers in Texas?”


QuotaBills
Dare to dream big. - Unknown

A big book is a big bore. - Callimachus

Never be too big to look up to someone. - Unknown

To die will be an awfully big adventure. - James M Barrie

You have to think anyway, so why not think big? - Donald Trump

Public behavior is merely private character writ large. - Stephen Covey

Little children, little sorrows; big children, great sorrows. - Danish Proverb

It makes a big difference in your life when you stay positive. - Ellen DeGeneres

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman

Texas is now a cornerstone of the electoral college for Republicans. - Ed Gillespie

The world is big and I want to have a good look at it before it gets dark. - John Muir

The only point in making money is, you can tell some big shot where to go. - Humphrey Bogart

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me. - C S Lewis

I am not worried about the deficit. It's big enough to take care of itself. - Ronald Reagan

There's no problem so big or complicated that it can't be run away from. - Unknown

It's the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen. - John Wooden

Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee, and I'll forgive Thy great big joke on me. - Robert Frost

I am who I am: an Irish Catholic kid, working class from Long Island. And I made it big. - Bill O'Reilly

The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure. - Joseph Campbell

If I had an ego as big as the Eiffel Tower, would I have won this many collective trophies? - Zlatan Ibrahimovic

The only way to see a movie is in a big theater, on a big screen, with a big bag of popcorn. - Dan Glickman

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

The greatest thief this world has ever produced is procrastination, and he is still at large. - Josh Billings

Do I have a large frog in my hair? I'm worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten. - Joaquin Phoenix

If God had intended for breasts to be seen, He wouldn't have created large woolen pullovers. - Tracey Ullman

Large, naked, raw carrots are acceptable as food only to those who live in hutches awaiting Easter. - Fran Lebowitz

The best rule of thumb for character is to remember that if you can't be big, don't belittle. - Unknown

Inherited wealth is a big handicap to happiness. It is as certain death to ambition as cocaine is to morality. - William K Vanderbilt

Money was never a big motivation for me, except as a way to keep score. The real excitement is playing the game. - Donald Trump

When ordinary people decide to step out and be part of something big, that's when they become extraordinary. - Brett Harris

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

What the insurance companies have done is to reverse the business so that the public at large insures the insurance companies. - Gerry Spence

If you want small changes in your life, work on your attitude. But if you want big and primary changes, work on your paradigm. - Stephen Covey

I am good, but not an angel. I do sin, but I am not the devil. I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone to love. - Marilyn Monroe

Deals are my art form. Other people paint beautifully on canvas or write wonderful poetry. I like making deals, preferably big deals. - Donald Trump

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

If you like the outdoors, Colorado is a big adventure playground for adults: it's great for skiing, cycling, climbing, and hiking. - Tyler Hamilton

Don't listen to those who say you're taking too big a chance. If no one ever took risks, Michelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor. - Neil Simon


see also   Farm  Section
Everything Is Bigger In Texas
My Daughter & My Money
Survivor - Texas Style (2013)
Texas Bank Security
Texas Office Chair
Texas Wink
Why We Live in Texas

 

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24-May-2020