Fatherly Advice

Dad & Son talk... be-fore it’s too late!


A father spoke to his son, “It’s time we had a little talk, my son. Soon you will have urges and feelings you’ve never had before. Your heart will pound and your hands will sweat. You’ll be preoccupied and won’t be able to think of anything else.”

He added, “But don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal... it’s called golf.”


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No. I am your Father. - Darth Vader

Golf is a good walk spoiled. - Mark Twain

A father is a banker provided by nature. - French Proverb

Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. - Paul Gallico

The uglier a man's legs are, the better he plays golf. - H G Wells

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

My father... one of the great immorals, er, immortals, of our time. - WC Fields

I got a new set of golf clubs for my husband. Best trade I ever made. - Unknown

My father was grounded, a very meat-and-potatoes man. He was a baker. - Anthony Hopkins

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - John Wooden

If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams

How has retirement affected my golf game? A lot more people beat me now. - Dwight D Eisenhower

One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was. - Anne Sexton

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

Those who slew my father I drove into exile... and defeated them in battle. - Augustus

Show me a good loser and I'll show you a man playing golf with his boss. - Unknown

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. - Jack Lemmon

The Holy Father's newest Encyclacle? Like anyone cares what he rides around on. - Archie Bunker

My father used to say, "Don't raise your voice. Improve your argument." - Desmond Tutu

One of the quickest ways to meet new people is to pick up the wrong ball on a golf course. - Unknown

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. - Robert Lynd

I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game. It's called an eraser. - Arnold Palmer

The most important thing my father taught me is that every man has to stand up for his rights. - Ziggy Marley

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

Golf is like any other sports competition. There is not a whole lot of point to it unless someone suffers. - Kevin Wohl

The game of golf would lose a great deal if croquet mallets and billiard cues were allowed on the putting green. - Ernest Hemingway

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. - Matthew 5:14-16

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. - Rodney Dangerfield

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley

My father instilled in me that if you don't see things happening the way you want them to, you get out there and make them happen. - Susan Powter

My father was a baker and a lot of people do what their families did and I could have done that but I wanted to stay in show business. - Christopher Walken

How shall a man escape from his ancestors, or draw off from his veins the black drop which he drew from his father’s or mother's life? - Ralph Waldo Emerson


see also   Golf  Section
Father Sayings for Father’s Day
Father’s Day Selfie
Ways to say “Dad” in Different Languages

 

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24-Feb-2020