Fatherly Advice

Dad & Son talk... be-fore it’s too late!


A father spoke to his son, “It’s time we had a little talk, my son. Soon you will have urges and feelings you’ve never had before. Your heart will pound and your hands will sweat. You’ll be preoccupied and won’t be able to think of anything else.”

He added, “But don’t worry, it’s perfectly normal... it’s called golf.”


QuotaBills
Golf is a good walk spoiled. - Mark Twain

Golf is a puzzle without an answer. - Gary Player

A father is a banker provided by nature. - French Proverb

Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown

If there is any larceny in a man, golf will bring it out. - Paul Gallico

The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. - Will Rogers

Golf is a game where the ball lies poorly, and the players well. - Unknown

She got her good looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon. - Groucho Marx

My father... one of the great immorals, er, immortals, of our time. - WC Fields

I got a new set of golf clubs for my husband. Best trade I ever made. - Unknown

Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! - Lydia Child

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. - Will Rogers

The best thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - John Wooden

If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams

One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

Don't talk about a rope in the house of someone whose father was hung. - Colin Farrell

In golf as in life, it's the follow-through that makes the difference. - Unknown

My heart is happy, my mind is free.
I had a father who talked with me. - Hilde Bigelow

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

Show me a good loser and I'll show you a man playing golf with his boss. - Unknown

Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

The Holy Father's newest Encyclacle? Like anyone cares what he rides around on. - Archie Bunker

It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father. - Pope John XXIII

My father used to say, "If you want to be different, do something different." - Wynton Marsalis

Middle Age is the awkward period when Father Time starts catching up with Mother Nature. - Harold Coffin

It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. - Mark Twain

You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. - Robert Frost

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

Don't you just hate it when you try to think of something other than golf... and you can't? - Mike Purkey

I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison. - WC Fields

Golf is like any other sports competition. There is not a whole lot of point to it unless someone suffers. - Kevin Wohl

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent back a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof. - Rodney Dangerfield

Golf is like a love affair: If you don't take it seriously, it's no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart. - Arthur Daley

My father instilled in me that if you don't see things happening the way you want them to, you get out there and make them happen. - Susan Powter

My father said there were two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers. The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better. - Marlo Thomas

Learning to play golf is like learning to play the violin. It's not only difficult to do, it's very painful to everyone around you. - Hal Linden

Luke, you can destroy the Emperor. He has foreseen this. It is your destiny. Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and son. - Darth Vader


see also   Golf  Section
Father Sayings for Father’s Day
Father’s Day Selfie
Ways to say “Dad” in Different Languages

 

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19-Nov-2019