Redneck Coffee Table

Your messages are all the coffee I need. - Unknown

I like my men like I like my coffee. Silent. - Anna Kendrick

Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? - Albert Camus

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons. - T S Eliot

At a round table there is no dispute about place. - Italian Proverb

Leanardo De Cappuccino: Founder, coffee shop chain - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Where love sets the table, food tastes at its best. - French Proverb

I think if I were a woman I'd wear coffee as a perfume. - John Van Druten

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

I'd rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck. - Emma Goldman

Behind every successful woman is a substantial amount of coffee. - Stephanie Piro

The Meathead swooped down on the table like a plague of crocuses. - Archie Bunker

Death is nature's way of saying, "Your table is ready." - Robin Williams

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

Without my morning coffee, I'm just like a dried-up piece of goat. - J.S. Bach

What would life be without coffee? But then, what is it even with coffee? - King Louis XV

The colder the X-Ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it. - Steven Wright

I did not literally paint that table, but the emotion it produces upon me. - Henri Matisse

Thirteen at a table is unlucky only when the hostess has only twelve chops. - Groucho Marx

I never drink coffee at lunch - I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. - Ronald Reagan

If there's no coffee, I'm not getting up. Make Groundhog Day just better. - ethicalbean

Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

One day my mortal body will turn to dust, but the Turkish Republic will stand forever. - Mustafa Kemel Ataturk

Everyone wants to eat at the government's table, but nobody wants to do the dishes. - Werner Finck

It isn't so much what's on the table that matters, as what's on the chairs. - W S Gilbert

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. - Reinhard Bonnke

I just want a hot cup of coffee, black, and I don't want to hear about your troubles. - Charles Bukowski

A half finished shawl left on the coffee table isn't a mess; it's an object of art. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Bad Luck: To have thirteen people seated at the table when you’re paying for the drinks - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee, and then after that still don't talk to me. - Unknown

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

For a great gaming experience, make sure the rails, cushion and slate of the pool table are of the best quality. - Unknown

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A giraffe's coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat. Ever think about that? No. You only think about yourself. - Unknown

You need the kind of objectivity that makes you forget everything you've heard, clear the table, and do a factual study like a scientist would. - Steve Wozniak