I went out with some friends last night and tied one on. I got really plastered.
Knowing that I was wasted, I did something that I have never done before. I took the bus home.
I arrived safe and warm, which seemed really surprising as I have never driven a bus before.
In wine, there is truth. - Pliny the Elder
Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling
Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown
Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown
I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn
When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller
It's too late Edith, my bus has sailed. - Archie Bunker
Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin
When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin
It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst
What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain
I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown
To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump
When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks. - George Burns
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King
Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others. - Samuel Johnson
I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz
Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine
There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid
I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde
Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor
Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling
Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown
Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown
I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn
When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller
It's too late Edith, my bus has sailed. - Archie Bunker
Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin
When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin
It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst
What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain
I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown
To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump
When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks. - George Burns
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King
Wine makes a man more pleased with himself. I do not say it makes him more pleasing to others. - Samuel Johnson
I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere
An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown
It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz
Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine
There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid
I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde
Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
Morals are not, like bacon, to be cured by hanging; nor, like wine, to be improved by sea voyages; nor, like honey, to be preserved in cells. - William Taylor
see also Bar & Travel Sections
Bus Head Rest
Bus Wait Weight
Cold Weather Travel Warning
Deluxembourg
Designated Driver
Drink Refill
Safe Drive Home
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18-Apr-2021 |