I went out with some friends last night and tied one on. I got really plastered.
Knowing that I was wasted, I did something that I have never done before. I took the bus home.
I arrived safe and warm, which seemed really surprising as I have never driven a bus before.
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson
Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller
Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson
Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman
There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson
Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown
Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber
God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying
Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov
New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King
I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere
It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker
You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. - Oprah Winfrey
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster
Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller
Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Good friends, like wine, get better with age. - Unknown
Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson
Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman
There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson
Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown
Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown
One martini is all right, two is too many, three is not enough. - James Thurber
God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying
Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits
I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown
You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown
Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov
New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
Measure thy life by loss instead of gain, not by the wine drunk, but the wine poured forth. - Harriet King
I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere
It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero
Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson
Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker
You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. - Oprah Winfrey
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe
NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster
see also Bar & Travel Sections
Bus Head Rest
Bus Wait Weight
Cold Weather Travel Warning
Deluxembourg
Designated Driver
Drink Refill
Safe Drive Home
 Bar Code Casualty |  Only In Texas |  Eastern Screech Owl |  International Sign of Marriage |  Soccer Watch |
 2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3) |  Science Project Turmoil |  Parking Forever |  I've Got Time |  Red Wine Diet |
 Nice Try, Mom |  Flight of the Ladybug |  Time To Retire |  Chess On The Wall |  Tree Face |
 Bad Day Flyer |  Back Bard |  St. Peter's Fish |  Feed Me |  Horse Model |
09-Dec-2019 |