Chinese to English Translation

Sometimes you just hear what you want to hear


At a travel agency in Shanghai, I asked the Chinese girl behind the counter if she could escort me on a city tour and asked her for her mobile number so I could call her to make arrangements.

She gave me a big smile, nodded her head and said, “Sex sex sex wan free sex for tonight.”

I replied, “Wow, you Chinese women are really hospitable!”

A guy standing next to me overheard, tapped me on the shoulder and said, “What she really said was: 666136429.”



QuotaBills
Glass: Chinese marijuana - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Silence is safer than speech. - Epictetus

Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted. - Groucho Marx

Speech is silver; silence is golden. - Thomas Carlyle

Speech is the small change of silence. - George Meredith

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. - Martha Graham

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

Tears at times have all the weight of speech. - Ovid

The English never draw a line without blurring it. - Winston Churchill

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

Germlish: Training done using a mixture of English & German - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The English have three vegetables and two of them are cabbage. - Walter Page

There is no language like the Irish for soothing and quieting. - John Millington Synge

If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. - Wilfred Sheed

When people are proud of their speech, be proud of your silence. - Luqman

All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity. - Gordie Howe

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so. - Gore Vidal

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm. - Alexander Woollcott

Civilization - a heap of rubble scavenged by scrawny English Lit. vultures. - Malcolm Muggeridge

A bore is one who has the power of speech but not the capacity for conversation. - Benjamin Desraeli

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. - Ingrid Bergman

When my friends and I played cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker. - Robin Williams

At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer. - Marshall Lumsden

Officialese: A government language where you can understand the words, but not the sentences - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If we do not believe in freedom of speech for those we despise, we do not believe in it at all. - Noam Chomsky

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Human language appears to be a unique phenomenon, without significant analogue in the animal world. - Noam Chomsky

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

The names of colors are at the edge, between where language fails and where it's at its most powerful. - A.S. Byatt

The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.999 percent of them are made by people who are still alive. - Joshua Bruns

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

Violence of language leads to violence of action. Angry men seldom fight if their tongues do not lead the fray. - Charles V Roman

When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let's say, China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time. - Donald Trump

Two may talk together under the same roof for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. - Mary Catherwood

Starbucks says they are going to start putting religious quotes on cups. The very first one will say, 'Jesus! This cup is expensive!' - Conan O'Brien


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29-May-2020