Chinese to English Translation

Sometimes you just hear what you want to hear


At a travel agency in Shanghai, I asked the Chinese girl behind the counter if she could escort me on a city tour and asked her for her mobile number so I could call her to make arrangements.

She gave me a big smile, nodded her head and said, “Sex sex sex wan free sex for tonight.”

I replied, “Wow, you Chinese women are really hospitable!”

A guy standing next to me overheard, tapped me on the shoulder and said, “What she really said was: 666136429.”



QuotaBills
Glass: Chinese marijuana - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

A riot is the language of the unheard. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Sooner or later, we all quote our mothers. - Unknown

Discretion in speech is more than eloquence. - Francis Bacon

Tea to the English is really a picnic indoors. - Alice Walker

Speech is the vestibule to the palace of love. - Jami of Persia

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. - Charles de Gaulle

Language exerts hidden power, like a moon on the tides. - Rita Mae Brown

He speaks English, Spanish, and he's bilingual too. - Don King

Real programmers can write assembly code in any language. - Larry Wall

All poetry is a reproduction of the tones of actual speech. - Robert Frost

The English winter - ending in July, to recommence in August. - Lord Byron

An animal's eyes have the power to speak a great language. - Martin Buber

When people are proud of their speech, be proud of your silence. - Luqman

All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity. - Gordie Howe

Think like a wise man but communicate in the language of the people. - William Butler Yeats

Civilization - a heap of rubble scavenged by scrawny English Lit. vultures. - Malcolm Muggeridge

No Chinese Catholics are allowed to worship ancestors in their familial temples. - Pope Clement XI

Three problems we have: lack of boundaries, insufficient language, incompletions. - Thomas Leonard

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers

I am going to give a long speech today. I haven't had time to prepare a short one. - Winston Churchill

Great literature is simply language charged with meaning to the utmost possible degree. - Ezra Pound

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. - Ingrid Bergman

At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer. - Marshall Lumsden

I never made a mistake in grammar but once in my life, and as soon as I done it. I seen it. - Carl Sandburg

Officialese: A government language where you can understand the words, but not the sentences - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I want to have a bunch of kids so I can open a factory and have free labor. Beat that, China! - Jarod Kintz

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

To suppress free speech is a double wrong. It violates the rights of the hearer as well as those of the speaker. - Frederick Douglass

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

'Good English' is whatever educated people talk; so that what is good in one place or time would not be so in another. - C S Lewis

An organization's ability to learn, and translate that learning into action rapidly, is the ultimate competitive advantage. - Jack Welch

All worthwhile men have good thoughts, good ideas, and good intentions, but precious few of them ever translate those into action. - John Hancock Field

It is Ireland's sacred duty to send over, every few years, a playwright to save the English theatre from inarticulate glumness. - Kenneth Tynan

Always try to use the language so as to make quite clear what you mean and make sure your sentence couldn't mean anything else. - C S Lewis

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks? - George Carlin


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24-Jul-2021