Queen Donald

Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson

What Britain needs is an iron lady. - Margaret Thatcher

England is a nation of shopkeepers. - Napoleon Bonaparte

I think Queen Elizabeth II is a charming woman. - Malcolm Muggeridge

I didn't know he was dead; I thought he was British. - Unknown

This is the sort of English up with which I will not put. - Winston Churchill

Germlish: Training done using a mixture of English & German - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You only have to survive in England and all is forgiven you. - Alan Bennett

The monarchical institution in England is immensely valuable. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Britain's last gold medal was a bronze in 1952 in Helsinki. - Nigel Starmer-Smith

In England there are sixty different religions and only one sauce. - Francesco Caracciolo

Elvis may have been the king of rock 'n roll, but I am the queen. - Little Richard

England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet

Civilization - a heap of rubble scavenged by scrawny English Lit. vultures. - Malcolm Muggeridge

There are ways of singing in English that are not just the same as in French. - Coeur de Pirate

The Irish and British, they love satire, it's a large part of the culture. - Ben Nicholson

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

The people of England are never so happy as when you tell them they are ruined. - Arthur Murphy

Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish. - Ted Whitehead

The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker

Let everyone leave all the guns - British guns and Irish guns - outside the door. - Martin McGuinness

Humour is practically the only thing about which the English are utterly serious. - Malcolm Muggeridge

The British have a remarkable talent for keeping calm, even when there is no crisis. - Franklin P Jones

To cure the British disease with socialism was like trying to cure leukemia with leeches. - Margaret Thatcher

The noblest prospect which a Scotsman ever sees is the high road that leads him to England. - Samuel Johnson

Ireland is a small but insuppressible island half an hour nearer the sunset than Great Britain. - Thomas Kettle

It's triple the Trump this season... I invited my children, Don Jr. and Ivanka into the boardroom. - Donald Trump

To many, no doubt, he will seem blatent and bumptious, but we prefer to regard him as being simply British. - Oscar Wilde

I alone of English writers have consciously set myself to make music out of what I may call the sound of sense. - Robert Frost

The seeds of learning can grow almost anywhere. Trump University and my other education-related ventures like... - Donald Trump

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized. - Oscar Wilde

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton

If there be a God, I think that what he would like me to do is paint as much of the map of Africa British red as possible. - Cecil Rhodes

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

The English eat all sorts of birds - pigeons, ducks, sparrows - but if you tell them you eat puffin, you might as well come from Mars. - Bjork

Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity. - Lord Mancroft

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher

Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin