Redneck NASCAR Astronaut

Flatulent racecar driver approaches takeoff speed



Jet powered scooter rivals NASCAR race - Astronaut Exhaust

QuotaBills
Add not fire to fire. - Greek proverb

OK, so what's the speed of dark? - Steven Wright

Damn the torpedoes! Full speed ahead! - David Farragut

Love in its essence is spiritual fire. - Emanuel Swedenborg

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest. - Homer

Speed is not a priority, just enjoy your hike. - Barry Putra

There is more to life than increasing its speed. - Mahatma Gandhi

Since the house is on fire let us warm ourselves. - Italian Proverb

Tell the men to fire faster and not give up the ship. - Captain James Lawrence

The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy. - Von Clausewitz

The speed of the leader determines the rate of the pack. - Wayne Lukas

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. - Buddha

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Contentment consisteth not in adding more fuel, but in taking away some fire. - Thomas Fuller

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

There are only 3 true sports: mountain climbing, bull fighting and auto racing. All the rest are games. - Ernest Hemingway

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. - Joan Crawford

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

Motivation is a fire from within. If someone else tries to light that fire under you, chances are it will burn very briefly. - Stephen R. Covey

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong

You can tell it's good if you light it and a blue flame comes up; that means it's good moonshine and it won't make you go blind. - Johnny Knoxville

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


see also   Bad Gas,  Car,  Redneck  &  Space  Sections
Amish Speed Wagon - NASCAR Debut
India’s New Space Program
Liftup Lunch
Redneck Space Shuttle

 

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17-Feb-2020