Fine: This is
the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to
shut you up. NEVER use “fine” to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you
to have one of those arguments.
Five minutes: This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your
football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so I feel that it’s an even
trade.
Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting
upset over “Nothing” and will end with the word “Fine”.
Go Ahead (normal eyebrows): This means “I give up” or “do what you want
because I don’t care”. You will get a raised eyebrow “Go Ahead” in just a
few minutes, followed by “Nothing” and “Fine” and she will talk to you
in about “Five Minutes” when she cools off.
Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very
misunderstood by men. A “Loud Sigh” means she thinks you are an idiot at that
moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over
“Nothing”.
Nothing: This means something and you should be on your toes. “Nothing” is
usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside
down, and backwards. “Nothing” usually signifies an argument that will last
“Five Minutes” and end with the word “Fine”.
Oh: This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; “Oh, let me get
that”. Or, “Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night”. If
she says “Oh” before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She
will tell you that she is “Fine” when she is done tossing your clothes out the
window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. “Oh” as the
lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more
to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows “Go ahead” followed by acts so
unspeakable that I can’t bring myself to write about them.
Please Do: This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to
come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have
done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn’t get a
“That’s Okay”.
Soft Sigh: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. “Soft Sighs” are one of
the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not
move or breathe and she will stay content.
Thanks: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint, just say you’re welcome.
Thanks A Lot: This is much different than “Thanks”. A woman will say,
“Thanks A Lot” when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have
hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the “Loud Sigh”. Be
careful not to ask what is wrong after the “Loud Sigh”, as she will only tell
you “Nothing.”
That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man.
“That’s Okay” means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you
retributions for what ever it is that you have done. “That’s Okay” is often used
with the word “Fine” and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow “Go
Ahead”. At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are
going to be in some mighty big trouble.
Women want love to be a novel. Men, a short story. - Daphne du Maurier
Women speak two languages, one of which is verbal. - Steve Rubenstein
A woman can keep one secret - the secret of her age. - Voltaire
The woman cries before the wedding and the man after. - Polish Proverb
Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson
All women are crazy, it's only a question of degree. - WC Fields
I represent the 'Wonder Woman' of the new world. - Gal Gadot
He has a woman's name and wears makeup. How original. - Alice Cooper
We're women. We have a double standard to live up to. - Ally McBeal
The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox
All the men in my family were bearded, and most of the women. - WC Fields
Honesty is probably the sexiest thing a man can give to a woman. - Debra Messing
I've never struck a woman in my life, not even my own mother. - WC Fields
Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears. - Dr. Phil McGraw
Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles
Between man and woman there is little difference, but vive la difference. - French Proverb
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. - Oliver Herford
He who has two women loses his soul. But he who has two homes loses his mind. - Ancient Proverb
The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud
She's the kind of woman who climbed the ladder of success - wrong by wrong. - Mae West
A woman will flirt with anybody in the world as long as other people are looking on. - Oscar Wilde
Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster
Inspirations never go in for long engagements; they demand immediate marriage to action. - Unknown
The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller
The age of a woman doesn't mean a thing. The best tunes are played on the oldest fiddles. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
A true relationship is when you can tell each other anything and everything. No secrets, no lies. - Unknown
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx
The key to a long and healthy marriage is that, honestly, there's nothing worth fighting about. - Jay Leno
Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice
A woman, especially if she has the misfortune of knowing anything, should conceal it as well as she can. - Jane Austen
Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum
We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx
If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him... is he still wrong? - George Carlin
Part of the reason that men seem so much less loving than women is that men's behavior is measured with a feminine ruler. - Francesca M. Cancian
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield
When I was a young man I vowed never to marry until I found the ideal woman. Well, I found her but, alas, she was waiting for the ideal man. - Alain
see also Relationship Section
A Woman’s Mind
Before Online Dating
Before The Impact
Everything Men Know About Women
Female Attraction
Flower Shop For Men
iGifts
Looking For Your Wife?
Mission Gap - for Men & Women
Names of the Colours
Real Man’s Point System
Romance Lost
Secret Of A Long Marriage
Sheer Surprise
Understanding Women
When Men Shop For Groceries
Winning An Argument With A Woman
 Party Direction Sign |  House 'Broke'rage |  'Piece of Cake' Resignation Letter |  Bee Safe |  Catfish Noodling |
 I'm A Believer |  Sewing Sculpture |  Greatest Italian Riders |  Batman Recession |  Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils |
 About Grandparents |  Split Personality Ad |  Happy Bithday |  Back 2 School Savings |  Redneck Wine Dispenser |
 Balloon Advertising for Exploding Results |  Cowboy Baby Carrier |  Make Womb For Baby |  Turtle Truck |  Zipper Building |
24-Sep-2020 |